Burdened by Books

 We are in the process of downsizing and I told myself I would go over my many books in the second bedroom today and give away some more.  We gave five bags to the library earlier this week—the maximum they would take.  We estimated that to be 85 books for tax purposes.

So I went to the shelves this morning and tried to get rid of some. I came up with two books and that is all.  I pull a book  off the shelf and remember how much I enjoyed it and how I might want to read it again.  I pull another unread book off the shelf and read the summary on Goodreads and think I would be happy to give it another try.  Many of the books I read and had rated five stars and gave great reviews.  How can I part with them?  

My life will not be long enough to read all these books.  And then I am tempted by buying still more for my Kindle app or checking out more from my “To Read Later” list at the library.  I am thankful for the joy of reading but right now I feel overwhelmed by my ambition to read and reread. 

————And then there are all of Jim’s books.  He may sell some to a Brooklyn bookseller, he will probably give many away to Princeton Seminary students or Princeton University graduate students.  The book dealer has been in contact with him; he needs to contact the students.  What is left, Byron Movers says they will give to some organization.  And a good many will make the move with us and will be left someday for our offspring to dispose of. 

Downsizing Again

 Seven years ago when we moved to Princeton, we got rid of so much stuff.  Books, clothes, furniture, papers—much of it found good homes because we had time to get rid of it.  I had book give-aways at church and was happy to see friends leave with books I had once loved.  Jim gave many volumes to a Theological Book Network.  I gave old bridesmaids’ dresses to the school corporation’s costume shop.  The family that bought our house bought lots of furniture from us.  We told them to make us an offer and when they did, we told them it was too much.  We were happy to leave a lot behind and that they could use many large items. 

This morning I asked Jim whatever happened to the beautiful illuminated manuscript Bible we had from St. John’s Abbey.  It was an oversized volume and we can’t remember what Biblical book it was.   I hope we gave it to a good home.  I wish we had kept it!

And I remembered high heeled shoes I can no longer wear and purses I haven’t used for years; there is a box of memories from the growing up years of the offspring in the garage; I filled up another box for Green Drop to pick up.  There are so many pieces of artwork that I treasure but have never hung on the walls here.  So much stuff.  

————-I went through a container of pills in the closet and we now have a bag full of expired drugs to try to get rid of safely at Walgreen’s tomorrow. There are old toothpaste and toothbrushes from years of dental visits under the sink in the master bathroom.  

I looked in the closet in the yellow bedroom and saw six framed pieces of artwork from our offspring’s childhood.  They are treasures to me but I hope the artists themselves will claim what they did.  Not really sure who did what because they are unsigned. 

———Laura claimed one and Dan claimed another.  Progress!  

It will all get moved and then can still be sorted.  But right now it all seems overwhelming.  Maybe by Thanksgiving we will be all settled into our new home.  Maybe by Christmas!  And for that matter, where will the Christmas box of ornaments and lights be stored?  Not in a garage like it is now.  Maybe in the storage cage Stonebridge mentioned.  

————If you are reading this,  I think I need some some encouragement that we are doing the right thing.  

The Road to Stonebridge is not Smooth

 I guess this title sounds a lot like last week’s blog entry.  But there are new problems as the previous ones get solved.

Monday we saw our Primary Care Provider Dr. Delacruz.  We gave him the lengthy forms to be filled out for Stonebridge.  We were pleased and he was pleased that neither of us needed EKGs or bloodwork because they had been done recently enough.  We had blood drawn for a TB test which was quite extensive—four little vials each.  Jim dutifully did his urine sample and I asked to do it at home.

It took until Thursday to get the TB test results after some puzzling posts from LabCorp.  Jim got his urinalysis results back but I did not.  Yesterday I checked with MIM (Montgomery Internal Medicine) and Jill, a very dear and competent aide, said it went in and just wait a day.  Today I checked with our sales representative Francesca Fogg at Stonebridge and she told me that Jim’s forms were faxed in, but mine were not. I followed up again at MIM and Jill found out that LabCorp could not locate my specimen.  So I have to give it another try on Monday. We will meet with the nurse at Stonebridge once our forms are in for her approval that we are “independent.”  

Meanwhile the moving company Stonebridge recommends is coming for our “free consultation” on Monday and we cannot set a date until all my forms are in and Stonebridge gives us a date.  Francesca said it would be OK to commit to them because this should not delay it much. We can commit but not to a definite date at this point. 

The timing of all of this is problematic.  Dr. Delacruz signed the form to help us break our lease here at Barclay Square.  But once that is in, we have 40 days left and we have to be out five days before that.  So really, 35 days after handing in that form.  So the movers have to come within that time frame and we need a place to go!  Jim thinks those five days are for them to clean carpets and clean the apartment all on our bill.  

I will feel relieved when we have a moving date.  We hope not to pay another month’s rent in November but we just may have no choice.  We hope to get our deposit back here and happily Stonebridge takes $3000 off your first month’s fees toward moving expenses.  I guess this gives Jim more time to find homes for more of his books.  I would love to have an overnight trip to the shore to celebrate and just get away.  I hope the next blog is full of definite plans!  

This is Not Easy!

Every day we make some progress toward a move to Stonebridge.  We signed papers of application this morning with Francesca Fogg and we handed over application fees and a deposit on our apartment.  After a little delay, the money was transferred into our account. (Although it says “pending.”) We saw a draft of the letter we will use to break our lease but that won’t be available until we get our medical forms filled out and the nurse at Stonebridge meets with us.  So we don’t have a move-in date yet. We chose carpet for the bedrooms.  We turned down the beautiful shelving and cabinets for now and can always add them later.  I am thinking the black bookshelves we have in the hall here can line a wall in the living room and that solves the problem of how to get rid of them.  

Byron Movers called this am and assured me they have availability in October yet.  So I hope we can get one of those dates.  But that cannot be settled until we get our medical forms completed along with the TB test and maybe other tests.  I had an EKG in January and hope that will do.  Jim has not had one for a while I think.

I set a goal of going through one shelf of books in the yellow bedroom each day.  I found book after book that I loved and thought I might reread.  I found only a very few that I put in the bag to donate to the library.  

Then I made myself go through a box of work related files and files from classes I took over the years.  That too was painful and I had to recycle papers that represented important information or lots of work at the time. I found thank you notes from students that were heartwarming.  I kept them!

Then there were the boxes of letters I had saved including heartfelt ones I sent to Jim when we were dating, the summer I was in Wheaton and he was in Kalamazoo.  I kept them back in their box and put it in the cedar chest.  

I hear Jim going up and down the steps to the garage and think he has begun sorting through his books as to which ones he wants to keep and which ones he can give to seminary students or sell to the Brooklyn bookstore owner. I know he finds that painful too. 

Yesterday I was in a panic mode as to what we could do with the large metal shelving in the garage.  Eboni said we could not leave it there for the next tenant.  Jeff said he could probably use it in their basement and could even put it in his van.  Problem solved! I am relieved until the next problem pops up!

 We had guests for supper last night and I thought that would be my last time for hosting a meal that I prepared.  I fixed a delicious salad supper and it went over very well.  I do not regret leaving that part of my life behind.  Our guests said they were expert movers and would help in any way we needed.  Just their reassurance was helpful!

——————I feel as if when we get one issue settled, more appear.  We got a big packet of move in information and forms from Stonebridge which ask for copies of our power of attorney forms, end of life forms, all our physicians and even our funeral home!  We have not gotten that far in our planning. It also had a page with getting to know you information requested—like what were our biggest accomplishments in life and what did we look forward to at Stonebridge.  I think I am not into that much sharing!  Not even my birthday for their lobby.  Besides the funeral home, there were other sobering requests.  Could they share our new address if we moved into a hospital or other nursing care?  Could they share the name of the funeral home when we die?  I am very aware that this is the end of the road for us—and for others.  We will get to know folks and then be sad when they are gone.  I had some real cold feet yesterday after looking over that packet.  But we are committed and it still seems like we cannot turn it down.  

A Big Move Coming Soon!

 

I had been concerned about new neighbors moving in downstairs again—our 6th new neighbors in seven years.  We had been told by a friend that a single man with a dog had looked at the place.  We did not know if he took it.  We thought this complex had a no pets policy as it was when we moved in but that may have changed.  Eboni, our leasing agent, informed me that barking dogs and noisy children were what you could expect in a multifamily place.  

So I called Stonebridge and told them that we could put our names in for a two bedroom place not just the two bedroom plus a nook or den that we had specified.  Tara hinted that would move our name up.  And so it did.  We got the call yesterday and went in to look at Number 107. It was a lovely apartment with two bedrooms and a large dining area which we would split up for eating and Jim’s study.  It had a fireplace and a screened in patio and two bathrooms.  We have to accept it within a week.

I am overwhelmed with what has to be done and typical of me, lay awake thinking of it last night.  I made a list and eventually got some sleep.  I got to work this morning.  I made an appointment with our doctor to get his OK for breaking our lease due to my lack of mobility and also to have him fill out the form that says we are independent and can take care of ourselves.  Jim called our financial planner in South Bend and got money transferred for our deposit which will be due on Thursday. 

These payments are not small amounts, but this apartment is considerably less than the one we specified earlier—both as an initial fee and monthly fees.  So that is a plus. And we have the funds thank God.  Our man in South Bend kept telling us over the years to spend what we had and we really did spend for  everything we wanted or needed.  But now it is good to have the funds to buy into an expensive life style.

We made choices to get the life care option so we could move into more advanced care if needed.  We also chose the 80% refund to our estate when the time comes. Both of those options make the initial cost higher. 

I felt better after emptying out several drawers in the yellow bedroom desk and putting my mostly purged journals of many years in one of them.  Lots of medical and prescription information went into the recyclable container.  Travel information may need another look before I get rid of it.  No one seems to want our soprano and alto recorders.  That may go to Green Drop for another pickup time.  

I emailed church to see if they were still collecting winter coats as we have not worn our woolen dressy coats for several years.  No need to move them.  The beautiful red dress I bought at Loehman’s in Durham years ago and wore to the State Department banquet honoring Jeff with his Math Olympiad teammates—I hate to give it up but maybe a photo will do.  I haven’t worn it for years.  (I didn’t put it in the Green Drop box but they did take the winter coats.)

We downsized seven years ago and don’t have as much to do this time.  And we won’t have to find new doctors and a dentist and a church and a library.  It’s all very scary but I am thinking of it as an adventure that we can thankfully do together at this point.  

September 5. One step at a time.  I scheduled Green Drop to come on September 14 and we will have several items for them again—a suitcase and matching travel bag, a golf cart, maybe the recorders, and a bag of clothes.

Laura says she will take the 100 year old rocking horse if the parents of the little one coming in November do not want it.  

Jim says he will contact the bookshop owner in Brooklyn who is interested in buying his books and will make a trip out here to look at them.  But first he has to go through them and see what he definitely wants to keep.  And he will have local students see what they want. 

Jim has contacted our financial planner in South Bend and we will have the money available by next Thursday for the down payment.  

I have a lot more peace of mind about this big move than I had in the middle of the night a few nights ago!  

————At our happy hour I asked Jim if we were going to take this apartment on Thursday and he said we were.  Now just to get our lease broken.  But both Eboni and Frencesca seemed to think that would not be a problem.  

I asked Jim to check out my addition to this blog post and he said it is a good thing we are recording all of this.  That is my primary motivation for this blog—a record of our lives that becomes a scrapbook of sorts in January when I have a book made of these posts.