Tuesday, December 31, 2019

Reflections on 2019

Copied from my first post of 2019:

"What will 2019 bring?  I feel well and am trying to tolerate the eye problems.  Jim's shoulder hurts enough today for him to take Aleve and ask for help getting into his jacket.  The RA does strike every once in a while but is usually under control.  Will we move this year?  What friends will we be praying for in particular this year?  Will our children and grandchildren be safe and healthy?  I look forward to a longer stay in Florida and more two week stays in Princeton--until the eventual move."

And now the last post of 2019:

It has been a momentous year in our lives.   Much of the first half of the year was spent getting rid of stuff in our house on Deerfield Loop and making plans to move.   The selling of the house went so smoothly.  It was a great blessing to sell it to the Leinens who with their six boys were so happy to have our big house.   I like to think of them there.  

It was Susan's suggestion to investigate  Barclay Square apartments here in Princeton which we did not realize were apartments, not condos.   We are happy with our location and the size of our apartment.  We have the money to pay for it and very much enjoy not worrying about things going wrong as we did with the last years of home ownership.   

We weathered the transition time well with our month in the Airbnb in South Bend and two weeks at Homewood Suites.   

We still have not decided on a church home.  When we first moved here, none of the three we attended seemed right to me.  After six months, I feel we could be happy in all three!   So that is progress.   We definitely have worshipped God in each one--Dutch Neck, Kingston, and Nassau--all mainline Presbyterian churches--two of them smaller churches and one quite large.  Singing in the Nassau choir has commited us for a couple of months and may influence the decision.  

I miss knowing so many people as we did in South Bend--at church and at ND and in our neighborhood.   I love havng the family nearby but I miss having lots of friends around.   I do keep in touch with Facebook and email and phone calls.

We have had many meals with Jeff and Susan's family; we have made several trips to Gladwyne for special occasions and just a few to NYC but we will do more.  We have gone to jazz concerts, children's theater performances, a Christmas pageant, and we have met our latest grandchild during the first 12 hours of his arrival.   All of that has been a great blessing.

The hard part of the year has been the many doctors' appointments we have had.  I thought about counting them but that might just be disheartening .  I have had more tests for tachycardia but all is good there with beta blockers.  I have had a couple of concerns for cancer but that too is no longer a worry.  I am sleeping far better than I have in a long time with the right medications and far fewer nights with Ambien.  And my eyes are doing well although I have not driven at night and don't intend to if I can avoid it.   

The big concern is Jim's diagnosed prostate cancer and the 44 radiation treatments coming up in February and March.  This will be a focus of our lives for a few months and in some ways, for the rest of our lives as he will need regular PSA checks even if there is no evidence of disease after the treatments because it can reoccur.   But we are 73 and our bodies are aging.   I am trying to accept that but finding it difficult at times.   I hope that the treatment is not worse than the slow growing cancer could be.   But we are following the advice of the doctors here (even if it differed from our Dr. Blechl in South Bend) and pray that it will be effective.  Jim's fainting episode has made me tense whenever we are in a crowded, hot place but we are trying to take precautions to avoid it happening again.  Life takes courage.  Aging takes courage!    

We lost one friend in 2019--a friend our age from our church in South Bend, Mic Detlefsen.  We were not there to celebrate his life with his family.  We mourned him from a distance.  

Will we continue to live in this large apartment?  Will we consider a retirement community like Stonebridge?   We look forward to a trip to Florida soon.  Will we make that research journey to the United Kingdom in May or will Jim get others to do his investigations?    Will there be any other additions to the family?  

In thinking about the bigger picture of our place in the world, I despair.  We are not at war but there are problem spots in Syria and North Korea and Iraq and I fear for our volatile leader President Trump and what he might do.   He has been impeached--one of only three presidents in our hisstory to have that label--but he won't be convicted by a Republican Senate.  I fear he could be re-elected and continue on his taking away money for research in science and sending out insulting and name-calling tweets to anyone who disagrees with him.   I no longer belong to what could be considered an "evangelical" church so I don't have the label of evangelicals for Trump of whom there are many including close relatives.  It is hard for me to understand his supporters when he  has lived an immoral lifestyle and is so nasty in his dealings with others.  What will 2020 bring politically?   Will our man Pete Buttigieg fare well?  

We are thankful to be facing 2020 together with family near by and friends as close as a phone call. Being aware of our vulnerability makes me even more thankful to be blessed by a husband of 52 years--the love of my youth and old age!     I hope I can summarize 2020 saying the same thing and that we can have peace of mind and acceptance with whatever it brings.  The lectionary for today is from John 1--the light shines in the darkness and the darkness cannot overcome it.  Amen!  




Monday, December 30, 2019

Why We Moved to Princeton, Part II

My phone sounded at about 3 am with a photo text from Michael saying "We will see" and a picture of Laura in a wheel chair and an empty bed.  So we got the news that she was in labor--three weeks early.   She was pretty uncomfortable late in her 5th pregnancy so this seemed like good news.

We did fall back asleep--restlessly--and were so happy to get the photos of the beautiful little baby boy around 7 am.   Jim was reluctant to go to see him as we knew that Michael and Laura had very little sleep but they seemed eager to have us meet the little fellow so around 3 pm we headed out to Wynnewood and the Lakanau Hospital.   It was an easy trip in spite of rain. 

We were thrilled to be able to hold the yet nameless little guy.  His eyes were open and he was looking around and taking it all in.   We stayed about 30 minutes and then headed home--just an hour's drive, not 12 like it used to be!   We followed Apple maps directions and ended up in downtown Philly--not our usual way home from Laura's house.   But all was well and we were obedient and eventually found our way to the familiar Route One through Trenton and on to College West and Barclay Square.

I just read the details of Laura's labor on her blog.   She had 200 plus comments on her instagram photo and 1000 likes--she does have a following!   The process was very much like Alex's birth 5 years ago except this time she and Michael were prepared for getting there quickly and so was the hospital.   We are feeling very thankful and relieved that all is well.

Wednesday, December 25, 2019

Christmas Day 2019 and Why We Moved to Princeeton

It has been a tumultous year for us with a major move and major medical issues.   But yesterday was a good reminder of why we are happy we made the move to Princeton.

We left early enough to account for possible traffic congestion on Route One or  I 276 or  I 476 and arrived at Bryn Mawr Presbyterian Church plenty in time for the 4:30 pm Christmas pageant in which all four Conway children particpated.   Sam and Jasper were readers, Ruth was one of the Magi, and Alex was a sheep.   The church was packed but we had good seats and were able to save seats for Michael and Grandma Di.  Laura had a responsibility as a sheep mom to keep order if needed.   We got a glimpse of Ruth and Alex and were so proud of the clear and poised reading of Sam and Jasper. 



We left Bryn Mawr around 6 and stopped for a McDonald's supper on the way home.   After a quiet glass of wine at our apartment, Jim dropped me off at Nassau Presbyterian Church for a 9 pm call and then drove to Jeff and Susan's house.    The choir had a last minute practice and headed up to the balcony where we listened to a beautiful harp prelude of Christmas songs.  I tried to let the music enter my soul as I prayed for strength and stamina for the music to come.

I was delighted to see Jim and the Princeton VKs find a seat in the balcony where I could see them easily.   There were a few smiles and waves at Grandma. I thoroughly enjoyed the role reversal because we have heard James and Katie sing many times and listened to Michael on his trombone as well.   The lessons and carols service at 10 pm went well but was a challenge to me mentally and physically. 

Jim and I arrived back home at our apartment at 11:40 pm and went to bed around 1 am.   I am reflecting on the day now and thinking that in the last few weeks I have not felt much peace but yesterday I was able to live the themes of the Advent candles with Christ bringing love, peace and joy.   I was grateful for feeling more peace and acceptance of what has happened and will happen in 2020.  And I was thinking of what a blessing it was to have our lives connect with all seven of our grandchildren yesterday.  We have a home here now.  We don't have to stay in a motel or drive 700 miles to get here.


Thursday, December 19, 2019

A Piano in my Life Again

Years ago I bought a used studio piano.   We moved it four times but this last move was just into our garage where Laura's piano movers picked it up and brought it to her house about an hour from here.   I am glad she can play the piano that she learned on and that her kids can use a real piano not just a keyboard.  She found room for it in her "library."

But I really have missed my piano.  I can walk to the clubhouse and play a beautiful grand piano but that means closing the heavy doors to the room, improvising a stand for music, and putting up with three stuck keys.   I can also go to Jeff and Susan's house and play their spinet piano which I had tuned.  I have done that several times and been happy I could do so. 

Last weekend Jeff texted and asked if I'd like to go on a keyboard shopping trip.  Sure, why not?    So they drove me down Route One to a place where they had rented beginning band instruments several times.   I tried a few digital pianos and learned how they are different from keyboards--weighted keys make them sound more like pianos and they have a sustaining pedal.   I found a large box that was a "package" of piano, stand, and bench for a decent price.   Jim was happy to have me pick out my own Christmas present and Susan was driving their van so  without any more fuss, I made the purchase and we loaded the box.   It was a lot easier carrying it up the steps to our second floor apartment than a real piano would have been.

Jim spent many hours putting together the piano stand.  As often happens, we did not have the right tools so he asked for advice at our wonderful Princeton Ace Hardware and bought a power screw driver.   Then the task went much better and soon he had the piano on its stand and plugged in.  Jim was extremely patient about the whole process.  I give him lots of credit for his work.

I began to play with some trepidation although I had clarified that if I wanted to upgrade I could return the piano for a better one within 30 days.  But this one is just fine for my purposes.  It may not be good for playing Bach and Scarlatti--I haven't even tried that yet--but it is fine for hymns and for my learning choir music. 

I posted a video on Facebook of my playing "Surely the Presence of the Lord is in this Place" and there were many kind comments from friends from South Bend and elsewhere.  I had joy in sharing my news on Facebook and connecting with my loving friends.  I am very, very happy with my Christmas present!




Tuesday, December 17, 2019

My Five Star Books for 2019

I have been reading many book lists from various publications for the end of the year or even the end of the decade.   I decided to look up my five star books as listed on Goodreads to put into my Blog2Print book this year.   A favorite genre is probably memoirs.  And mysteries.  Several books were rereads--Having Our Say and Gilead and My God and I.   Others were by authors I know or have had some personal connection--Swartz, Walterstorff, Plantinga, and Vanderkam, of course!   There are some authors who come up every year--Connelly, Berry, Modiano.  There are 26 books listed--one for every two weeks.   Lots of good reading from local libraries and often from Better World Books.  (Don't know why the formatting looks so bad--when I try to edit it, it looks fine.)



A Country Between: Making a Home Where Both Sides of Jerusalem Collide
                                  



Gilead
Marilyn Robinson


Maggie Now
Maggie Now                                                                                
                         
Betty Smith



A Place On Earth
Wendell Berry

Lost and Wanted
Nell Freudenberger

The Diary of a Bookseller
 Shaun Bythell



The River

Rumer Godden

Juliet's School of Possibilities: A Little Story about the Power of Priorities

Laura Vanderkam



In Hoffa's Shadow: A Stepfather, a Disappearance in Detroit, and My Search for the Truth

Jack Goldsmith

Sleep of Memory

Patrick Modiano



Akin
*
Emma Donoghue



Having Our Say: The Delany Sisters' First 100 Years

Sarah Delany



The Friendly Persuasion
 Jessamyn West


All Among The Barley
Melissa Harrison

The Second Worst Restaurant in France (Paul Stuart, #2)
*
Alexander McCall Smith


My God and I: A Spiritual Memoir

    Lewis Smedes


A Gentleman in Moscow

  Amor Towles


Such Fine Boys
 Patrick Modiano



Ask/Tell/Order/Make: A Police Sergeant Reflects on the Job
 Adam Plantinga



Newcomer (Detective Kaga, #2)
Keigo Higoshina


The Night Fire (Harry Bosch #22; Renée Ballard, #3; Harry Bosch Universe, #32)
*
  Michael Connelly



Night Train

 Martin Amis



In This World of Wonders: Memoir of a Life in Learning
 Nicholas Walterstorff



Nathan Coulter: A Novel (Port William)

  Wendell Berry

The American Agent (Maisie Dobbs, #15)