Christmas 2023

 

It's Christmas Day.  We can still look forward to a dinner at Jeff and Susan's home with all of our grandchildren plus a boyfriend plus a boyfriend's parents.  Is this a step in a relationship when it is time to meet the grandparents?

Saturday was our family party at the Conway's home with 17 of us.  I had settled on quilted vests from Land's End for everyone aged 12 and up and was very pleased to see that many of the group donned their vests immediately.  The chocolate letters are a tradition that always seems appreciated. Michael and Laura had a great dinner for us with beef tenderloin, mashed potatoes, and green beans.  Dan and Alex made a spinach salad and cookies.  And how happy we are that Susan is always willing to make her wonderful rolls!  H helped me put together a snow man brownie.  A highlight for me was our all joining in singing Christmas carols--from sacred ones to a vigorous The 12 Days of Christmas with Susan helping us all keep track of where we were.  Even little H could join in on Jingle Bells.  I took a video but I will joyfully keep the vision and sound in my memory.

Sunday was Christmas Eve.  We could have gone to church four times.   We settled on three livestream services. We did the Nassau Church 10 am service from home and then were happy we could do the Bryn Mawr Presbyterian Church nativity pageant from home too.  R and A were readers and did their readings so well.  H was an adorble sheep peering over the rail overlooking the pulpit area. We saved our church's 9 pm Lessons and Carols for this morning while making banket.

Banket!  Two years ago I said never again, but for some reason I decided to try once more.  Now I say again no more!  Next year I order from VanderVeen's Dutch Store--ready-made, not pounds of almond paste. Rolling out the pastry, removing it from the parchment paper, sticky hands from the almond filling--what a mess!  I will give some to our neighbors downstairs and bring some along to the Princeton VKs and maybe one for Alonso, our former maintenance man who once asked me if I could make some for Halloween too!

I hope and pray that we have many more Christmases to celebrate together with our families.  I feel very thankful for this one!

Why We Moved to Princeton

 

Jeff and Susan live ten minutes away from our apartment.  Laura and Michael and their family live about an hour away.  Dan and Alexandra are about 2 1/2 hours north of us.  This means that holiday get-togethers are possible without a 700 mile trip east on I-80.  But it also means that we can participate in other family events.

In the last month or so we have gone to Katie's Princeton University Ballet show.  We have seen Susan's photos in a photography exhibit.  And last night we went to the Harriton High School Winter Concert in which Jasper sang in the large concert choir, the select and auditioned Vocal Ensemble and the acapella group Pitch Please.  When the large choir opened with "Festival Gloria" -a gloria in excelsis deo--I just closed my eyes and let the beautiful sound enter my soul.  

I'm so glad we can support our grandchildren in their musical endeavors.  Adding to these events, we livestreamed Michael's George Washington Jazz Orchestra Holiday Concert and Lessons and Carols from Bryn Mawr Presbyterian Church--in which Laura and Jasper sang and Jasper read a lesson.  It was good to be able to do those events from home because traffic along the eastern corridor is often very heavy--as it was last night. We were home safely by 10 pm.  

I'm Happy Because I Sing

A few years ago our church choir director quoted an aged choir member who said, "I don't sing because I'm happy; I'm happy because I sing."  Singing does bring joy!  

This fall Jim and I began singing with the Grace Notes Singers, a group of older folks who meet twice a month at a nearby senior citizen community.  The director is the music director at our church, Nassau Presbyterian Church, and is a wonderful musician who also has the gift of being a great teacher and a person who accepts less than perfection!  The music he chooses has been challenging  and really beautiful.

Today our group led an Advent Communion Service for the residents of the community.  Next week we will do the same service at another nearby senior community.  

It has been a joy to make music with others again--and to do it with Jim.  He encouraged me to join and I encouraged him to drive me there and give it a try.  

A Voice from the Past

 On Wednesday morning I woke up to a message on Facebook from a 5th grade student in 1968 wondering if I was the Mrs. Vanderkam who was the "beautiful woman" who was his teacher.  He said he saw my name through one mutual friend and if I didn't want to respond that was OK but if I did, he had "more to say."  

I remembered him--but have to say one memory was when he jumped out an open window when we had a fire drill.  The principal came on the intercom and said, "Mrs. VanderKam, tell your students to leave by the door, not the window."   I was not happy!  But I did not think I would remind him of that incident!

I sent him my email making it easier to communicate because I don't often use FB messenger.  He wrote me a long email.  And of all things, he said he wanted "to issue an apology for jumping out of the window of your classroom during a fire drill and inspiring xxxx to follow me.  Hope you didn't get in trouble for that."

I was so tickled that after 53 years, this was still on his mind!  It seems amusing now, but it was not funny at the time!  I was angry and embarrassed.  And as I was rarely angry at those students, it must have made an impression that lasted! 

He also remembered my doing a mock election and exactly what the numbers were--one for Humphrey, one for Wallace, and all the rest for Nixon--including his which he said would no longer be true.  He remembered my bringing in a TV for the World Series--and he found a note I wrote to his parents telling them that he was a good writer.  All good memories!

I was also amused that others at his recent 9th grade reunion remembered a class trip in which I did a very unteacher like thing--and wore a bathing suit!  He was not in that class he said or he would have remembered!    I laughed out loud reading that and hoped it was not the Italian bikini I had purchased the previous summer!  I still have a photo of Jim and me on a Mediterranean beach from that summer but I will not post it!  Maybe I can find a less revealing photo of those mini-skirted, long-haired days.

What a lovely thing to get his affirmations and thanks from so many years ago.  Those were three good years of teaching 5th grade and then 6th grade. 

Holiday Planning

Holiday planning and preparation is so much easier than it was years ago.  My daughter and daughter-in-law settled who would host Thanksgiving and who would host Christmas.  I asked what we could bring but did not get any definite answers.  Our traditional fudge?  Dan said he would make it using the lessons he has learned from The Great British Bakeoff.  My usual sweet potato and cranberry dish? No.  Last year I wrote a reminder to myself that Jim and I were the only ones who really liked it and the leftovers lasted a long time! 

I will try to make a cheese and fruit platter that looks like a turkey.   I bought some asparagus this morning.  Last Saturday we saw a turkey cake at McCaffrey's but I didn't buy it thinking it was too soon to purchase it.  So today we went back, hoping there were more.  And there were loads.  I even got to thank the bakery manager for her efforts.  The cashier, an older man, wondered if we could stop the line, get coffee and dig into it!  

Every year I ask one of the grandchildren to read Psalm 100 before we eat.  Several of the older ones reminisced about how it was their turn over the years.  It was a rite of passage.  The child I asked to do it this year may be reluctant but his older sibling has already made plans to take over if needed.  I felt so good that the tradition was remembered by others besides Grandma.  

Then there is Christmas planning.  For years, planning for work at Family Literacy took effort.  It meant buying lIttle gifts for the children, finding someone to be Santa Claus (I always successfully recruited someone who was African-American), organizing food to be served and a place big enough for parents and children and staff to sit down and eat.  But those days are done and I remember them fondly but with a measure of relief too!

Gift-giving is a joy but also a source of stress.  I want to give just the right gifts but am at a loss for what that can be.  This year I have already purchased gifts for the women in the family.  The men and boys?  I have no idea but I am collecting suggestions.  I will remember to buy chocolate letters from VanderVeens Dutch Store--early enough so that they can be mailed out in time.  One year it was a crisis when I was too late.  The same child who remembered Psalm 100 has asked about the letters in the past.  Another tradition that I want to keep going!   

Everyone will remember when one grandson opened his gift last year and found Jim's puzzle book under his gift that I thought I lost.   My Amazon boxes got mixed up and Jim got his puzzle book after all.

It is a joy that we will travel four miles and not 700 miles to spend the holiday with our family.  Everyone should be there--several hours home from college in D.C.,  several hours from work in Maryland, an hour from Gladwyne, Pennsylvania, and 2 1/2 hours from Wallkill, New York.  Plus two others dear to our family from New York City.  How many of us?  16 I think!  What a blessing!  I am thankful!  ( I was corrected--18--I forgot Jim and myself!)

-----------December 21  All gifts are purchased and have arrived.  All shopping was done online which seems a bit sad to me, but was easy. The chocolate letters have arrived.  I can't do the banket because I still have the end of a cold.  I hope we can go to our family party at the Conway's.  I will probably be over the cold but Jim's is four days after mine and he is really coughing a lot.  

A Saturday in Princeton

 

Most Saturdays involve a morning of errands and shopping.  There is almost always a trip to McCaffrey's for groceries and often a stop at CVS for prescriptions.  Sometimes we make a trip to the library to pick up my requests. And later in the day we cheer for the Irish when there is a Notre Dame football game on TV.

But this week there was no game.  We made just a one stop trip to McCaffrey's. And then we had an afternoon and early evening of adventure.

We drove ten minutes to Jeff and Susan's house and they drove to the Princeton campus on surprisingly busy roads.  They had tickets to the 5 pm PUB show--Princeton University Ballet--in which Katie was dancing.  It was so good to have them know their way around and for us to be able to follow their lead. Katie was in only one number this semester due to her busy schedule as a Mechanical Engineering PhD, living off campus, and teaching a class.  But as always, it was a great show of amazing dancers and the best number for us was the one in which we got to see Katie. (modern dance, not ballet and very lively!)

From there we walked across campus to Birdivirsity--an opening reception for photos of birds in which Susan had two photos accepted.  It was great to see the enlarged photos with her descriptions. We were proud in-laws!

Again, we were happy to have transportation provided as we headed to Nassau Diner, a restaurant right across from our church that we had never noticed.  With breakfast served all day, there was a variety of good choices and we all had delicious suppers.  

Jeff and Susan have been so good in welcoming us to their home town for the last four years and we are grateful to be able to share in their lives here.   

A Visit to Shawangunk (and Dan and Alexandra)

 

We are home from a short overnight visit to see Dan and Alex in Wallkill, New York.  It may have been a bit past peak leaf peeping time but the ride there and back was lovely and the view from their home was spectacular--looking up at the Shawangunk Ridge (I think that is what it is called--Gertrude's Nose was one rocky cliff).

We began our visit with a walking tour of New Paltz's Huguenot Street in which our guide Eddie told us the history of the first settlers with an emphasis on debunking the usual theories of their fleeing religious persecution.  He included accounts of the Lenape Indians who were there first and the slaves who lived and worked in the homes of the patentees. 

We had a very nice dinner at One With Land, a new restaurant that had taken over from one called Owl and paid tribute to its predecessor with its new name.  After dinner, Jim and I were introduced to the Great British Bake Off so we feel we are now more culturally aware.

D

This morning we did a bit more sight-seeing beginning with a look at the extensive garden Dan and Alex have created.  Then our first stop was the Shawangunk Reformed Church founded in 1730.  The church doors were open for visitors.   The cemetery was huge--with almost 300 years of burials.  

The next stop was the Shawangunk Grasslands National Wildlife Refuge where Dan and Alex look for birds that are native to the diminishing grasslands in the USA.  I was fascinated to see what grasslands look like--not just reading about them in the memoirs I've read recently about prairie life.  The grass is taller than I imagined and waves in the breeze.  Dan and Alex feel privileged to live so close to a national wildlife refuge.  They spotted fellow birders Tom and Jane (a lot closer to our age!) and exchanged ideas of what they could see in the area today.  (cattle egret--not usually in Ulster County)

It was an easy ride home and we are glad that there is no evidence of our mouse invasion--no smell.  We shall see if it is quiet tonight.

Our children have always enriched our lives with their interests and activities and they continue to do so as adults!  We are thankful!