Books!

 A week or two ago, I was trying to go to sleep but I would close my eyes and envision books tumbling over me.  I felt overwhelmed by the books in the hall and in the garage.  Even Jim said he was feeling overwhelmed;  he thought he had gotten rid of so many books before we moved.

And he had!  The Theological Book Network gave him tax receipts for more than 1000 books that he had donated--some right after he retired and the rest in May--books that go to third world seminaries.  He estimates that he gave at least that many to students at Notre Dame.  We put numerous books that he thought were of little value in Better World Books bins where we had heard (and hoped) that they would be recycled for their paper.

After we moved into our apartment, we bought six three-shelved Sauder bookcases from Skillman Furniture and Jim began filling the shelves. He went back to buy one more five-shelf bookcase later.

When I posted on Facebook about our dilemma, one suggestion was to Kondo the books--did each one that was left in boxes or on the floor bring Jim joy?  He said that was the wrong question.  The right question was would the book bring him work?  Or assist his research?

Maybe breaking down the task into manageable parts would help.   I labeled boxes Trash, Garage, and Students.  I would hold up a book and Jim would decide where it fit.  We did that over the last week--a section each day.

There are now five boxes of books that Jim hopes to give to students at Princeton University or Princeton Seminary.  Just how that will happen is to be determined. 

 There are eight boxes of books stored in the garage and we are optimistic that there might be room for the car now.

 And then there are the trashed books.  It makes me sad when I think of the work each author put into his or her volume.  We recycled all the paperbacks and one by one I tore out the pages of the hardbacks to recycle their paper.  We made daily trips to the recycle bins in our apartment complex.

I am pleased to say that as of August 13, 2019, a month after we leased our apartment and four weeks since we moved in, we can walk through the halls without having to avoid books.  And it looks great!

A Sleepover with Grandpa and Grandma

Laura was taking her older three on a Disney cruise but felt very uneasy about taking four year old A along for the sake of his safety.  Just this month a child from our own home town of Granger fell overboard through an open window on a cruise.  So she asked if A could have a sleepover with us as something special for him.

 It was special for him and for us.  This morning he said to me "Today is going to be a great day."  I asked why and he answered "It's a surprise."  I asked him at lunch if it was a great day and he said it was!

It was 24 hours from the time his nanny dropped him off until we brought him back to her at home.  Only once did he say he was homesick as he was trying to go to sleep last night.  Otherwise it was a continual refrain of "Guys, you know what?" with lots of happy chatter.

We had asked the nanny to bring his little bike.  That was probably not the smartest idea because he is sooo fast on it that we could hardly keep up.  He took a spill or two but got up and kept going.  We found a safe circle around the playground for riding and he did that circle again and again.

After supper we walked to the place where we had seen deer previously and last night there were ten of them there.  That was pretty exciting and caused us to do research on whether deer slept during the day or night.  Answer--they nap and don't sleep soundly any time.  But they are more active during the night--which A told me means they are nocturnal.  He knows a lot of words!

We played dominoes,  read books, got out some of our kids' really old toys and were introduced to some of his favorite Kindle games. There was plenty to do and no time to be bored.

The plan for sleep was that A would sleep on the floor in our bedroom in a sleeping bag.  At some point, he convinced Jim he needed to be in our bed and that is where he fell asleep.  We hated to move him so I went to sleep in the second bedroom.  Jim lasted for a very short time with him because of his snoring.  So at 1:30 am when I checked on both of them, there was snoring in the bedroom and snoring on the living room couch.  I happily went back to sleep in my quiet room.  We were amused that A took over our new, big,  comfortable bed and we were displaced and sent elsewhere.

More experienced grandparents would have remembered to get A's car seat out of the van.  We didn't want to ask the nanny to make the return trip so I braved Route 1 traffic and merging to go to Walmart and pick up a $19.95 booster seat which Jim put together using the newly purchased screwdrivers. 

The apartment seems empty tonight without him.  It is a real blessing of our being here in this area that we can do this.  We have been grandparents for 21 years and this is only the third time we have had a grandchild over by himself or herself.

Princeton--Small Town America in New Jersey--Garden State

Many years ago our North Carolina governor, James Hunt, warned that our state could become like "creeping New Jersey"--just one big urban area.  Parts of New Jersey are probably like that but the Princeton area is not.

We drive to Jeff and Susan's on two lane roads lined with trees.  We take a similar route to McCaffrey's Groceries and to the doctors we have seen.  Going in the other direction to the Plainsboro Library and Meadows of Middlesex Golf, the roads are broader but they wind their way through large commercial campuses that are hidden from the road by large trees.  It's taking the scenic route daily.  I anticipate the beauty of autumn when the leaves change color.

There is a disadvantage to this rural feel.  We hit a fawn dashing across the road a few weeks ago.  We just missed a much larger deer crossing our path this morning.








Skillman's Furniture Old and New has been our place to buy numerous bookshelves and a TV stand.  The store is a mess of crowded furniture but we found exactly what we needed at a very reasonable price and it was delivered to our door for a minimal fee.  Mr. Skillman has long grey hair and he rings up the sale by hand.  We have been happy to "buy local."

Ace Hardware stores are everywhere but the one in Princeton Shopping Center is amazing.   There is always someone to help you find what you need and give advice.  Our purchases include picture hangers, a dust buster, a set of screw drivers, pliers, and coasters.  It definitely is better than wandering around the big box stores.

Jim broke a tooth shortly after we arrived.  He was not in pain  but it needed care.  We found a dentist who took our insurance for exams but not for procedure.  He booked with her anyway.  He went in on a Saturday and met her in a very old house on the main street in Kingston.  She had no assistants, took an x-ray herself and showed it to Jim without putting it on a computer.  She did not ask for payment ahead of time. Jim saw her again today in a similar situation but said she seemed very competent and he paid her for half the cost. He has at least one more appointment scheduled.

When I looked for a scanner to check out my book at the Plainsboro Library and couldn't find one, I asked for help.  There were no self service scanners-the librarian at the desk claimed he was a lot better looking and he checked out books.

With the exception of the Division of Motor Vehicles, everyone who has waited on us or helped us has been very friendly and kind.  I hope we continue to feel as if we are living in a small town in a garden state.

What I miss...

One of the lectionary psalms this week was Psalm 84 which starts "How lovely is your dwelling place..."  and as I read it, I had a pang of homesickness for our church in South Bend.  I liked walking into the empty sanctuary when I went to practice the organ.  I liked the calm and welcoming space.  I sometimes sat in the pew and prayed for myself, our family, and those who worshiped there.

One night this week I lay awake from 1:30 to 3:30.  I got up and looked outside.  I wanted to see my neighbors' homes on Deerfield Loop--the Walshes, the Koldas, the Konjathys.  But instead I saw cars and apartments; I don't know who lives there and I might never know who lives there.

We watched the Cubs a few times this week on MLB Network.  I missed My Michiana and JD and Len announcing the game.  I missed their quiet repartee and their love of the Cubs.  I even missed some of the awful local commercials.

I miss my special spot in the backyard at Deerfield Loop where I sat in the chaise lounge and looked up at the trees overhead.  I am thankful that we look out on trees from our apartment windows but my lounge is on our little deck which faces the garages of our neighbors.  I can look up at the sky however!

Yes, I do miss South Bend friends but we continue to have contact through email and Facebook and I am grateful for that.

And truly, it has been such a joy to be with our children and grandchildren here.  Katie is home for a month before her senior year at Duke and Jim and I took her out for breakfast.  Yesterday she joined us on a trip to see eight-year-old Ruth in her theater camp play. Ruth beamed with delight when she saw that Katie had come to her performance.  Tonight we are joining Jeff and Susan and Michael for supper--about a once-a-week occurrence.

This will become home too.  It becomes more so every day.  We walk in from the heat of outside and it is cool and comfortable.  Yesterday the missing sea glass bottle collection showed up and is now in the kitchen window.  I will buy a planter for outside the front door that will welcome us with color.  It's been just a bit over two weeks since we moved in and that is really a very short time for adjusting to a new way of life.

Apartment Living

We walked through Ace Hardware at Princeton Shopping Center on Saturday and I thought of all the items we no longer need.   Weed killer, fertilizer, paint, tools, and even the deer-rabbit pellets I saw one man purchasing at the cash register.  We are not sorry to have given up home ownership.

On the other hand, today we made a major shopping trip to Walmart, Bed Bath and Beyond, Macy's and Pier 1.  We bought cheap pillows for the shams that go with the comforters that came yesterday.  We bought rugs and hand towels for the bathroom and kitchen.   We bought pot holders even though I am sure I packed some which we cannot find.  Amazon Prime sent us an alarm clock-I think I left ours at the Airbnb in South Bend.

So far it has been very quiet here at Barclay Square except for the constant whir of air conditioners.  Ours goes non-stop during the day set at 76 but registering 79 right now at 7 pm.  We are not sure if we have neighbors below us and next to us.  If so, we don't hear them.

There are 220 units here at Barclay Square.  There are many young families and non-English speakers.  We hear a variety of languages in the swimming pool or  on cell phone conversations.

Our daily routine is a walk to the 1900 Building, the club house, where we get our mail sometime after 4 pm.  I have been doing some exercising in the pool late in the day.  And I have used the club house's beautiful grand piano playing a little Bach and Scarlatti.  I try not to be shy about realizing that the sounds do carry through the building.

Another part of our routine is a walk to the recyclng bins and trash compactor. After spending thousands of dollars to move, we drew the line at another $125 for debris removal of all the paper, bubble wrap, and boxes that we have been emptying.  So we break down the boxes and put a few in the bins each day.  Happily, a family responded to a notice I put in the club house and took several large dish boxes and all our bubble wrap.


 Using a truck-size trash compactor is a new experience.  You put in the code, the door opens, you throw in your trash, close the door, and that's it.  I am glad our apartment is not next to the noise as it eats up our trash.

We may be able to park in the garage very soon as we empty more and more boxes.  For now many of Jim's books are still boxed up or sitting on the floor until we can get the Sauder bookcases we have ordered from Skillman's Furniture--Old and New.   Making decisions about where to hang paintings is not easy but will be done one of these days as well.  We don't want to get too accustomed to paintings stacked against the walls and books lined up against the walls.

We have made progress--some each day.   And we are satisfied with that for now.

It's Becoming Home

Where are the pots
and pans?

Found--with the
book boxes!

Every day we unpack a few more boxes and make a few more purchases.  Today I found the vegetable prints for the kitchen.  I filled my mother's WWII vintage "hope chest" with photos and memorabilia and stuff--without much order but at least they are not in boxes any more.  We bought more cleaning supplies and basic food like pasta and rice and flour at McCaffrey's, our new go-to grocery store.   I ordered some dryer balls from Amazon and a quilt set for the queen sized bed from Bed Bath and Beyond.

One of these days we will not have to unpack any more boxes and purchase any more necessities.  Maybe then I'll get into more of a routine of exercise and reading and cooking meals.  But for now most of my energy has gone into getting settled.  Jim, however, has had joy in using his work computer again and getting into his projects more easily.

Every day the apartment looks more lived in.  We haven't hung anything on the walls yet but some books and photo frames are out and in place.

The best features of the apartment are its windows including two bay windows which bring in a lot of light.  Another great feature is the walk-in closet. Less desirable features are the bathroom and kitchen cupboards which are deep and high and do not make for easy storage.  I miss my kitchen and bathroom on Deerfield Loop which had the features I chose over the years.

With a second floor apartment and 95 degree days, the A/C just couldn't keep up.  We would set it at 72 and it would get to be 80 by suppertime.  It would cool off by the morning again.  However, that was an unusual heat wave and we hope that was the worst of it.  Ceiling fans helped a lot.

The best part of being here is that our goal of seeing our children and grandchildren more has really come true.   Since I last wrote, we had supper with Jeff and Susan twice.  We went to Jasper's performance of Guys and Dolls, an hour and a half ride away at rush hour and only 53 minutes on the way home.

 And we had all 15 of us here on Sunday afternoon for our "housewarming" party.  It was 99 degrees outside and we raised the temperature to 83 inside with all of us here.  A swim for many of us felt great.  I looked over the pool at everyone and felt like the "fruitful vine" from our wedding tape and I was so thankful.   Jim and Jeff picked up Olive Garden takeout, I made sangria and  we had a Friendly's ice cream cake.  Michael brought us a housewarming gift of a bottle of wine he was given on his Philadelphia Jazz Orchestra tour of Italy.  Laura and Michael brought Prosecco which we didn't notice and will save until later.  Susan brought us a peace lily on a stand--a gift that should last!


I had asked the younger ones to find the movers' green stickers on all the furniture and they jumped to the task with much enthusiasm putting them on a card I gave them.  R asked if they could take the card home with them!  And today they found another one on the piano that was moved from our garage to their house in Gladwyne.

We have plenty of boxes to unpack.  We need more bedding, a file cabinet, and more lighting.  The walls are very white and blank and sterile.  However, 508 Barclay Square is beginning to feel like home.

Another Week in New Jersey (and New York)

Saturday--Getting a Princeton Library card was a big step for me in belonging here.  However, because our apartment is just over the line from Mercer County and in Middlesex County, I had to pay the senior rate of $75.  It will be worth every bit of that!

I braved Route One by myself and did a bit of recreational shopping.  Nordstrom Rack was a mess but I did buy a comfortable top.  Sadly, my arthritic hip suddenly hit me with pain and I cut the shopping trip short--only to find myself heading south to Trenton on Route One instead of north to Homewood Suites.  It took a few miles but I got turned around.  I blame the jug turns and the construction and the overwhelming Saturday afternoon traffic!

Sunday we worshiped at Nassau Presbyterian Church and happened to end up in the pew with our good friends the Moorheads.  I was glad to be there but I found myself missing the warmth and fellowship and music of our church--and I will need to stop calling it "our church" in South Bend.  Jeff and Susan had us over for a supper of grilled chicken and baked potatoes.

Monday was a day of accomplishments in getting doctors' appointments for new patient physicals, re-routing pension and social security checks, changing addresses, and for Jim, still more conference calls with TIAA and our ND Private Member Group with Michael Schultz, one of our advisers. We spent most of the morning on the phone or online.

In the evening we had a lovely dessert and visit with Martha Himmelfarb and her husband Steven Weiss.  Jim knows Martha from their professional interests and she is the one who arranged library privileges for him at Princeton.  Steven is an artist and had some fine work displayed in their 1880 home--a block off Nassau Street.

Tuesday we purchased beds and paraphernalia from Princeton Mattress Shop where I think we got overwhelmed by the owner; however it did save us from any more shopping!  We arranged for xfinity hookups and then treated the Moorheads to dinner at On the Border courtesy of gift certificates from my Bible study friends in South Bend.

Wednesday Jim golfed nine holes at Meadows at Middlesex which I assume was a big step in making him feel more at home.  We were able to see our apartment for the first time and it looked lovely and spacious.  I fixed chicken stir-fry for Jeff and Susan and James at their house.  The sad part of a good day was that we hit one of the omnipresent deer when two of them bounded into the road from the Delaware Raritan Canal into the woods.  We hit a fawn and it went limping off.  We were sick about it but Susan comforted us by saying that they are called Jersey Rats around here.

On the A train

Thursday we took New Jersey Transit to NY Penn Station and the A Line to Brooklyn where we stayed in a Hilton for $3.50 thanks to all those Hilton credit card points!  We treated Dan and Alex to dinner at Rucola's for Dan's 35th birthday.  The restaurant definitely had what Alex called Brooklyn Vibe--it was noisy, crowded and expensive and Jim and I had to be twice the age of most of its patrons.  We had umbrellas but got very wet anyway as we walked the half mile back to our hotel.  We shared a bottle of wine there where we could hear each other talk!  At the beginning of the trip I wondered if we still had the energy to handle Uber, trains, subways, hotels, crowds, etc.  But we did it and enjoyed it!

We're back at Homewood Suites now.  Tomorrow we get the keys to our apartment and next Wednesday we hope to have our furniture as well and then our time of transition will be over!

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