Eleven Days Left in South Bend

I haven't written a blog post for over a week.  I think that is a sign that the novelty of being here at Notre Dame has worn off.  These days I have a sense of being neither here nor there--as if I don't know where I belong.  This may be a reason for my unsettled feeling.  I really looked forward to this stay in South Bend and it has been good to see family and friends. But I am also counting the days now until we go "home" to Princeton.  Our accommodations have been less than ideal but we have coped and soon we will be back in our lovely Barclay Square apartment. 

This past week we had dinner with others three times.  This coming week we will have dinner with others three more times.  The last week here has still one more dinner date scheduled.  This is far more sociability than we have had for two years and it has been good.  Although I brought a scale along to keep track of my weight, I haven't even lifted it out of the box we brought it in.  I am afraid to check because I know we are not eating as healthfully as we do at home.  I have cooked very few meals--hamburgers, eggs, chicken salad, tuna melts--and that is it.  I plan to do a chicken stir fry but had to buy olive oil, rice, and soy sauce--just for one meal.  Those items will travel well enough to bring them back to Princeton with us.  

Mercado Stripes
(Sloan)

I played the church organ once and really don't have a strong desire to try to do it again.  That is one more thing in my life that is coming to an end.  I visited the Snite Museum this past week and enjoyed seeing some of my favorite works and was reminded of the stories I told the third graders when I was a docent there.  I hope to return to museum visits in Princeton and even in New York City but I have no desire to be a docent again.  Another chapter is closed in life.  I pulled books off the shelves at the Francis Branch Library and even downloaded an ebook thanks to the fact that my St. Joseph Library card was still valid.  I loved that library but I like the Princeton Library too and don't see myself as a volunteer again.  My short stint at the Plainsboro Library as a volunteer was back breaking literally so that is another door closed.  

Taos Skies (Huggin)

We worshipped at Church of the Savior this morning again and will have one more opportunity to do so next week.  I looked at the worship bulletin for Nassau Presbyterian Church this morning and thought that maybe it was a sign that I was thinking of that church as "our church" too.  But at CotS we know everyone and if we don't know someone, we are pretty sure they are visitors and should be greeted and welcomed.  That feeling of belonging is not the primary reason to worship, but it is a joy and may never be possible in a big church like Nassau Church--and one where we will never be as involved in music or leadership.  However Jim is teaching an adult class in late October so more folks will know him.  

I will be happy to be in our Barclay Square apartment again.  I will revel in two bathrooms with one very pleasant shower with room for my personal items next to the sink. I will be happy to use the sink without feeling like I need to put the top down on the toilet lest I drop something in it!  There will be counter space in the kitchen and storage space for food in the cupboards.  It will be great to see the sporting events Jim likes on a larger TV.  I will be glad to get the exercise we get going up the 14 steps to our second floor apartment and our daily walking to get the mail or to get rid of the garbage or recyclables.  

Yesterday's email brought an opportunity to make an appointment for the Covid booster shots very near our home in New Jersey.  The slots available were before October 11 when we will be at home and free to sign up.  So I will wait a few days to peruse the site.  However, it is encouraging that it may be easier this time around to get an appointment and to hope that we can continue to feel safer in our area.  

This post is a recording for our memories of this time.  We don't regret making the effort to be here.  Jim's class has gone well and the students have been very appreciative of his being here.  He is beginning to get the usual requests for recommendations which have always been a part of his work and it is affirming that his name and good word mean something to others in his profession. 

My sister wondered when we would ever see each other again.  Jim's siblings expressed gratitude to me for initiating our meeting for dinner.  It's a long trip to Princeton so it is very good that we were able to make those visits when we were all in good health.  

I think this blog post shows that I am anticipating a return to what has become home for us in Princeton. We are thankful to be closer to our children and grandchildren and thankful for a very comfortable place to live without the concerns of home ownership.  

It's Beginning to Feel Like Home

Our house as seen
from Douglas Road

It's our fourth week at 53730 Juniper Road and the last few times we walked into our little house I thought that it was beginning to feel like home.  Thanks to Steve's care (head of maintenance) of us the first week, things are much better than they were.  The second window air conditioner has made cooling the bedrooms possible.  Plus the weather is cooler. The worst of this place is the little bathroom with no exhaust fan and a very feeble shower.  

This weekend's news was of a fatal shooting at a party house in South Bend.  It took place at a house of Holy Cross undergraduates and the neighbors said that there were often loud parties until the wee hours in the area.  That made me thankful for our quiet house where the only real noise is the toll road traffic but that is far enough away that it is not disturbing to me.  

Three roundabouts 
to our house

I am also thankful to have a washer and dryer in the kitchen.  I have to use the top of them for counter space but it is so good not to have to go to a laundromat.  Right now the bath towels are spinning in the dryer where I put them after our showers lest they get all sour smelling in the bathroom where they cannot dry out.

So three weeks from today we will leave for Princeton.  We have two dinner dates scheduled and at least three more in process.  I hope to practice the church organ soon but told David I would rather not play for Sunday's service.  

Yesterday I had visits with three friends or groups of friends.  It was good to have in person glimpses into their lives.  That was my most social day so far and today nothing is scheduled.  Although Jim suggested we think about our weekly grocery trip so that we avoid the football crowd this weekend.  Actually I have been so disorganized that I went to Martin's three days in a row earlier this week but but it is a quick and easy trip--easier than our grocery trips in Princeton.  (although every trip seems to involve three times of negotiating roundabouts!)

We turned on the TV last night to watch the Cubs without any drama of wondering which remote we should use and which button we should press.  The Marquee network is part of our package.  Sadly the Cubs lost on a passed ball in the bottom of the 9th but the loss was to the Phillies which I consider my team on the east coast. 

Maybe I'll go shopping at Talbott's or Chico's today.  Maybe I'll stop in at the Francis Branch Library.  Or maybe just sit on my lawn chair in the back yard and read a book.  Jim will meet his class this afternoon.  I am glad he is enjoying his students and the word from others is that they are enjoying the class.  So that is the most important takeaway from our seven week time away from Princeton.  And Princeton really is our "home." 

-------------September 21--Steve came by today to change the showerhead which will probably make our showers a better experience. I told him how much we appreciated him. I asked about his days off last week and he said they were spent playing golf which got our conversation going to courses in the area. Then he said that he tried being a professional bowler for a while in his youth but couldn't make a living at it so he got into maintenance. I had Jim tell him about his honorable withdrawal card from the Teamsters-probably one of the very few professors who can say that (thanks to summer jobs at Eckrich Meats in Kalamazoo). I told Steve he is the only former professional bowler we know! And what fun it is to know that. Now, if the shower is improved too how good that would be-even if we only have two weeks and two days left here. Yes, I am counting!

Notre Dame Football from Juniper Road

 

NBC did not broadcast ND's first football game of the season.  It was streamed on Peacock and we chose not to subcribe just for that game.  So I listened to ND radio on my phone  in the bedroom while Jim watched other games on TV in the living room of our South Haven condo. 

 At 5 pm, he asked if I wanted a glass of wine and I declined to have it alone in the bedroom.  Jim said I could bring the radio broadcast into the living room.  He hates listening to games.  I think it is because he feels a loss of control!  Later I found out he was not happy with my exclamations of joy and disgust emanating from the bedroom.  

ND pulled it off in a game that should not have been so close.  The new quarterback was sacked six times.  It was not pretty but it was a W as Jimmy Valvano used to say during his Wolfpack days years ago.  (32-29 over Toledo)

We were concerned about getting back that night into our rental house on Juniper Road which is usually one way traffic heading out of ND's campus post game.  So we stayed in South Haven until 7:30--1 1/2 hours after game time--and then headed home.  There was no problem heading towards campus at 8:30 so we were fine.

Sunday we observed chalk lines on the neighbor's lawn where they must have sold parking places.  The lease for our house specifically said that we were not allowed to use our lawn for football parking.  

Preparations for the home game were underway early in the week as we saw rows of Joy's Johns at the edge of parking lots all over campus--not just near the stadium.  There were signs telling people how to access their mobile tickets--a first game without paper tickets.  I wonder if the usual scalpers were at their places on Angela Boulevard this year.  Apparently the stadium was not full--60,000 in attendance instead of 80,000.  

We will see what happens next week when Purdue comes to ND.    We have a special hang tag that is supposed to allow us to move around campus streets but if the streets are one way into campus pre-game and one way out of campus post-game that will not make it easy to make our usual Saturday grocery shopping trip.  We will be able to watch the game on NBC and we might take in some of the pre-game excitement and rituals on campus.  

Go Irish! ---------------I walked outside to get rid of the garbage and heard music. It was the ND band practicing in the fields across Douglas Road and it was the Irish Fight Song I was hearing!

South Haven: Packing and Unpacking

Today we made our second trip this week back to South Bend from South Haven.  Jim had a candidate's job talk and  recruitment dinner on Tuesday and today and tomorrow he is leading his seminar.  Some people commute an hour daily so doing this twice in a week is not so bad!  I decided not to stay in South Haven alone without a car so I kept Jim company on the trip and during those afternoon and evening hours on Juniper Road just north of the Notre Dame campus.

I have been a bit overwhelmed by the constant packing and unpacking however.  Today we left Jim's shampoo in the shower in South Haven and my favorite pillow must be there because it is not here!  I have had more trouble with insomnia this week and I am attributing that to the transitions--and wanting to enjoy South Haven so much.  Plus we are constantly problem solving to get wifi access, run the TV remotes and turn the kitchen fan off. (a new remote battery was the answer)  Yes, these are first world problems but they are a challenge for two 75 year olds! 

Last night's sunset over Lake Michigan was worth the confusion of our many transitions.     We walked to town and waited 20 minutes as early as 5:30 for a table at Clementine's, a favorite and always busy restaurant.  We were walking home at 7:30 when I said to Jim, "I think it is beginning to rain."  Within three minutes, there was no doubt.  It was a downpour.  We took shelter at the entrance to the Maritime Museum and checked our weather app which said it would stop in 20 minutes.  It did lighten up and we walked the rest of the way home.  It was good to put on dry clothes.  Our shoes were still wet this morning. But then the sun came out over the lake and the sunset was glorious.  The sky was pink for miles north of us and the water reflected that pink sky.

The condo we rent in South Haven is so lovely.  And it is well equipped unlike this Notre Dame rental.  There was plenty of toilet paper, hand soap, paper towels,--even a bottle of Merlot and a container of coffee.  The owner gave us a $25 gift card to Bunde's Bakery, another favorite place two blocks away, but sadly they will only be open on Saturday and Sunday mornings for a few hours each.  This is the Covid story--staff shortages everywhere.  We'll get ourselves a treat and then leave the card for housekeeping to use. 

Jim and one of his favorite golfing buddies, Uncle John Lukaart, golfed at Hawkshead while my sister Lois and I did a bit of shopping.  We were happy to see our favorite women's apparel store, Janny's Beach House, was still open and I left with a shopping bag in my hand.  

It has been too windy and cool to enjoy the beach and the pool.  But the best part of renting #301 at 225 North Shore Drive is looking out at the lake which is always beautiful.  We will head out there again tomorrow afternoon for another 24 hours and maybe another beautiful sunset. We have to time our return to South Bend carefully however because Juniper Road has always been one way traffic on game days--coming into campus pre-game and leaving post-game.  

Patience

The Professor 

 It has not been an easy two weeks.  Packing up to make this temporary move to South Bend was stressful.  Our first week here was uncomfortable in the heat and with inadequate air conditioning.

We have finished our second week away from home.  Jim is teaching his fourth class as I write and it has gone well.  He is thinking of ways to get class participation so it is not his lecturing for a three hour session.   One student had a family crisis and is now in Columbia but other students are arranging  Zoom participation for him. 

I left my webbed chaise lounge chair at home in Princeton even though I knew I would like to have it here to sit outside.  There was no room in the car.  We couldn't find one here at a decent price, or really at any price, so I ordered one from Amazon thinking it was quite the extravagance when I knew it was just for six weeks.   And then it did not arrive as promised.  The update said it was coming late--and then it was possibly lost in transit--and then today, nine days after I ordered it and a week after it was promised, it arrived.  I'm glad I did not ask for the refund they offered.  I sat outside in the back yard and revelled in the breeze and being able to look at the tall trees--just like I did when we lived on Deerfield Loop.  I could hear insects but not the shrill sound of our Princeton 17 year cicadas.  I could hear distant traffic but it was not as loud as it can seem at night with the windows open.  (The toll road is within sight down Juniper Road.)  

In two days we will leave for a week at our condo rental in South Haven.  I look forward to seeing sunsets on Lake Michigan and to enjoying a decent shower and larger bathroom.  I have some concerns about being out there alone without a car when Jim has to commute to Notre Dame so I may come back with him for those two nights. It will be another transition and I am thinking that we are getting too old to keep changing our routines like this.  

A funny example of our need to cope and adjust was the fact that we did not know the dishwasher was a portable one and had to be hooked up to the sink.  No wonder it burned the food on the plates and silverware as it generated heat but no water.  Now we know but it may still be easier just to do the dishes by hand.  That is Jim's job but in his absence today, I did a few meals' worth and felt so good to do it for him!  Jim was musing about the fact that someone should have told us that it needed to be hooked up; it was certainly unfamiliar to us. 

 I have to be patient with myself and try to live in the present moment.  It was lovely sitting outside in the back yard in my new chair.  We have made progress in being comfortable in the last week with cooler weather and a better air conditioner and windows that maintenance was able to chip open.  

I have some sense of how I felt at the beginning of the pandemic over a year ago when I had to learn to be content with accomplishing very little in a day.  A load of wash, a trip to the grocery store, a book to read--it has to be enough.  I used to worry that solitude would be the curse of my old age because I craved it so much when I was busy with work and family.  Now I need to enjoy that solitude.  A good book, a blog to write, a chair in the backyard--all ways to try to be contented and patient.  I am trying to live in the present moment and to enjoy it and thank God for it.