Why do a Blog?

 I like reading Lithub which I get in my daily email listings.  Today's email quotes Anne Youngson, a novelist who published her debut novel at age 70.  She writes about writing in a time of the social isolation we all experience during this pandemic:

Much of what has been created to give purpose to lonely, empty hours will not be seen by future generations—the muffins eaten, the gardens remodeled or abandoned. Words on the page, though, have longevity. Like the bones of a transport infrastructure, they have the possibility of remaining visible and giving those who come later a view backwards to enrich their understanding of the present. (the reference to transport infrastructure is because her newest book is set in the canal system of the United Kingdom.)

I do have "lonely, empty hours." I don't write for publication except for my Blog2Print books of which I now have at least ten years worth.  These books are my treasures as they bring back memories of good times and not so good times.  Even memories of this past year fade-which may be a good thing.   Jim sat on the couch and read through the entire 2020 book when it arrived and said he enjoyed it.  I said that was because it was often about him--so of course, he enjoyed it!   

Nancy, my dear neighbor in South Bend, commented on the blog that my recollections of the January 6 "assault on the capitol" and the January 20 inauguration of Joseph Biden will be a documentation of our world and my life in it for our children and grandchildren.  Maybe they will have an interest in those memories.   One of them, the 14 year old, is very interested in genealogy. I wish that we had more written stories from our parents.  We treasure the ones we do have.

This morning Maggie, another dear friend living many miles from us,  emailed to say that she had just read my blog and was having similar issues getting a vaccine.  It was so good to hear from her and it is reassuring to me--as I think it was to her--that we are not alone in this dilemma.   

In the first years I was blogging, I was thinking through the options of changing jobs and eventually retiring.  It helped me to organize my thoughts and process decisions.  I don't publicize my blog as some do and have maybe ten regular readers. The blog is the public face of my thoughts; there are pages more in my private "therapy journal" and "spiritual journal."  Those are downloaded on my laptop and can be easily deleted.  Not everything needs to be shared! 

This makes two blog entries this week and a record number for one month.  Once again, I will use the word "unprecedented."  It has been an "unprecedented" month.  Do I dare hope that it will be a more normal year? 

FOMO Fear of Missing Out

FOMO is the acronym that exactly describes the way I feel these days.   

I was happy to see friends who were nurses and doctors post on Facebook that they had received the Covid vaccine.  There were photos of bare arms getting the shot with happy comments.   Then I began to see friends my age posting that they had received the vaccine.  And I wondered when it would be our turn.

Here in New Jersey we got email notice that we were in a priority group because we were over 65.  We checked the other conditions list because I have hypertension and Jim has had cancer--both conditions under control we think.   After a bit of time we got another email notice that we could make an appointment for the vaccine.

That's when we ran into trouble.  We were not familiar with the sites listed in MIddlesex County but when we tried for any one of them we were told they were not making appointments.   When we extended the mileage range and the date range, it did not help.  So we gave up.

We do have local friends who have had their vaccine but they live in Princeton itself and thus Mercer County, not Middlesex County.  I have noted on the Wall Street Journal website that both counties are high risk.  

So for now, it appears that there is nothing we can do to get the vaccine.  Last night, Dr. Barbara Edwards, a physician who sings in my church choir, said on our Zoom choir gathering, that we all had to be patient.  There would be more vaccines available in a month or so and more sites opening.  She said she felt as if she had to put some of her anxious patients on anti-depressants as they were so worried.  I understand the feeling!   I found her comments reassuring. 

 I read a Facebook post on a neighborhood site where someone else was having the same difficulties we were having getting an appointment even while trying every half hour.   I am not about to consume my life clicking on the DOH site every 30 minutes.  Yesterday, my friend Peggy and I had a good masked walk down the canal towpath and it was reassuring to know she is struggling with the same issues including the feeling that it is hard to think of good things we want to do when we are so limited to home.

We will just have to wait.  We will double our masks today when we go to CVS for our prescription refills because the new variant of Covid is supposed to be more contagious.  We will continue to stay out of places where people gather and go to stores as little as possible. We will not enjoy restaurant meals but maybe get another take-out meal this week.  I did go to the Princeton Library reserve shelf twice before they closed down again due to a staff member being positive for Covid. That concerns me but I was in and out and not near any staff members--well, not very near--I did speak to two of them probably from nearer than six feet.  

We don't have any travel plans.  I'd love to make a heart shaped cake with my dear grand-daughter Ruth who has told me she loves to bake special things with me and that I know good things to make. (I have maybe a total of three things I can do but I appreciate her perspective!) But if she goes to school, can we safely do that together?   Laura has asked us to have grandson Alex over in May when she takes the three older children on a trip.  We would be happy to have him, but would feel safer if we had the vaccine by then.  We have missed going to Florida this January for the first time in maybe five years.  I would love to go to Florida--even if it is April--but only if we get the vaccine.

So, patience has to be my key word.  And patience is not one of my virtues.  I like to make things happen and feel in control.  And that is impossible right now. 

-----------------February 5  I logged into the NJ-DOH site and put it yet another request for an appointment--saying within 50 miles as a parameter.  To my surprise, options appeared.  I quickly clicked on February 25 at 9:45 am at Gloucester County Megasite and went into the study to get Jim to sign up as well.  We went through the process together and he got an 11:15 am slot.  Now we have to find Gloucester County and its Megasite--I think at Rowan College.  We thought we would do a trial run sometime next week.  Progress!  I still think I will try CVS next Tuesday for an appointment closer to home.  I have downloaded their app and so should be able to contact them quickly if they have vaccines.  

A New Era

 Yesterday was the Inauguration of President Biden and Vice-president Harris.  It was held on the Capitol steps where two weeks earlier a mob had invaded the "people's house" and threatened the legislators who were affirming the electoral college vote.  When speakers referenced the fact that democracy prevailed, it didn't seem like a cliche.  It was for real and something to be thankful for.  

Passwords and Pin Numbers

 By 11:30 am today,  I had been asked for my password or pin number three times.  

Early this morning,  while "doomscrolling," I was reading an article from the Wall Street Journal and it went behind the paywall.  We subscribe to the electronic version but when I tried to put in my password, I was told it was wrong.  I connected via Facebook (not sure if that is a bad idea!) and that password worked.  I finished reading the article.

Later I accessed my patient portal at the Women's Health Center to request a prescription refill.  Fortunately, the site remembered my password and I made my request.  

Then we went to the local PNC bank with a few issues for which we needed help.  Jim needed his PNC app downloaded after deleting it when we thought he might have been hacked.  I wanted to have my email added to our banking information in case something happened to Jim. And I didn't know what my debit card pin number was and couldn't find a record of it.  The assistant was very patient and helpful and I now have a new pin number.  I better write it down somewhere before I forget this one too.

I feel as if my life is too full of passwords and pin numbers.  I don't know how a password manager works but am not sure I trust that option.  I have a password that I probably use too often--but it always comes up as a "strong" one.  And I can remember it!  

Our parents never had this problem but also did not have the convenience of technology--requesting a prescription online, depositing checks with a phone app, and reading the news from anything but a local paper delivered at the door.  Sometimes I feel concerned about the need to keep our wits about us and not suffer from dementia.  Or are we already a bit at a loss from where we should be in 2021?  

I give credit to the assistant at PNC who was very patient with our requests and did not make us feel as if we were wasting her time at all.  And now I shall read a book  ordered from Amazon and downloaded on my Kindle app on my iphone.  

An "Unprecedented" Week

 I wrote the last post on January 6 before the "unprecedented" events of January 6 took place. President Trump held a rally in Washington DC to protest the meeting in Congress which was scheduled to ratify the electoral college's vote to say that Biden won.  Whether Trump actually and literally incited his supporters to do so or not, the crowd marched to the Capitol Building and got in.  The legislators were evacuated to safe locations where they spent hours until the building could be cleared.  Five people died--one a woman shot by the police and one an officer clubbed by a fire extinguisher.  Photos were taken of a man in the dais where Pence had been presiding; another one of a man with his feet up on Pelosi's desk in her office.  There were Confederate flags, a noose, handcuffs, and lots of MAGA hats.  The capitol police were overwhelmed.

2021--the Great Unknown

The "word" for the year 2020 is "unprecedented" and that does summarize the year.  A year ago I wrote in my spiritual journal that I objected to a 12Blog writer posting with optimism about the blank page of 2020.  I was apprehensive about 2020 knowing that Jim would be facing treatment for prostate cancer and couldn't think of a blank page with eagerness.   Little did I know that we would all be facing a pandemic that killed over 350,000 in the USA.  That we would be wearing masks if we went into any stores or met with others--even our own family in their homes.   And that we would still on January 5, 2021 be concerned about the presidential transition with President Trump continuing to refuse to concede and over this past weekend asking the Secretary of State in Georgia to "find" enough votes to overturn Georgia's handing Joe Biden a win.  Maybe he will be indicted for that illegal phone call but probably not.  

Christmas Foods

Dan asked what was our traditional Christmas dinner? Was it ham? Then he asked about any other traditional foods for Christmas. Jeff asked why we always did pigs-in-a-blanket for Christmas Eve? He said his family continues the tradition. When I asked, Aunt Lois said her family does too. This year with our Covid19 prescribed isolation, many traditions have taken a blow.But we have kept some of them. Pigs-in-a-blanket--My family of origin always had them on Christmas Eve so I guess I just continued that tradition. My sister and I used to compete to see who could eat the most! My mother told of checking to see which ones had the most meat--and then going for those. So the tradition must go back one more generation. The recipe is simple. I use Bisquick dough for the pastry and a combination of ground sausage and hamburger for the meat. The tricky part is coming out even with no meat or dough left over. They were delicious again this year--although we ate them on Christmas Day--so I guess we broke tradition a bit. Our Christmas Eve diinner was takeout from Olive Garden.