Thursday Nights with Mounjaro

 When it comes time for my weekly injection of Mounjaro, I can’t believe it has been a whole week.  I feel as if I just stuck myself 24 hours ago.  And I rebel because I didn’t want to do it again. Each time it is a bit intimidating because the procedure does not seem to take place like the instructions say.  There is no up to ten seconds between clicks—the clicks are simultaneous and then we carefully look for a little red puncture wound and the fact that the plunger is down in the apparatus.  And we do know that I push away from the table before I finish my meals and I have lost  maybe five pounds and I do have some indigestion although not bad at all.  So there are signs that it has happened and has its effects. 

When I was feeling a bit sorry for myself,  I remembered how Jim drove down Route 1 to UCA for 44 days of radiation.  He didn’t complain—at least not much.  Just when the routine got changed when there was a machine malfunction.  And all of this with Covid precautions so I really could not keep him company even when he got to ring the bell on his last day of treatment. And now five years later, he is doing well with one good follow-up test after another every six months.  

So I am doing this to get that A1C down to pre-diabetes levels again and Dr. Delacruz assures me that it will be successful.  I know it is worth avoiding diabetes to lessen the danger of heart disease and strokes.  

So that’s it for another week.  I am grateful there is a treatment that I can do and that I can afford the medication and that my husband is right here to support me through this each week.  

The Last Time

 This is not going to be a morbid post in spite of the title.

Last week Wednesday we picked up a butternut squash in our CSA basket.  One week later, I finally got to googling a reminder on how to peel a butternut squash with ease.  I sat at the kitchen table and successfully peeled the squash.  Then I tried to cut it into pieces to make soup and it was too hard for me to get the knife through it.  So I will wait until Jim comes home from his golf game and ask him as my strong husband to do it for us.  I will make the soup and not throw away the squash.

But it is the last time.  When we move into Stonebridge, it would be foolish to sign up for CSA again next year.  And someone else will peel and cut up the squash if we have the seasonal butternut squash soup.  And I will not feel guilty about throwing out good food—or the potential for good food.

As I have fears about a whole new way of life, I have to remember the reasons we are making this big move.  So I don’t have to cut up butternut squash ever again!

Progress! (But Not Enough!)

 I am feeling better about this big move after we made some progress today.  I will wait to post this hoping that we make even more progress in the next few days.

Sandra, a consultant with Byron Movers, came today and I signed a contract for everything they offered.  They are not the movers themselves but they help plan where your furniture can go in the apartment, they pack and unpack, and dispose of boxes and wrapping (which really appealed to me!).  It was worth the money to make the move as easy as possible.

We left five bags of books at the library, the maximum they would take at one time.  Walgreens would not take expired drugs but said they have to go to the police station.  That will be a place also for used mounjaro pens.  I scheduled Green Drop for another pick up and have several items and boxes set aside for them.  

Sandra said they would keep up with Stonebridge about setting a date.  There is nothing I can do about that until my LabCorp test is done and sent to the nurse at Stonebridge.  Meanwhile, I may tackle the other forms they have sent us. No, I don’t want my birthday posted and I don’t want to share my greatest accomplishments.  I know it is meant to help us be a part of a community but that was a bit too much for me at this point.

————

September 22 I woke up to the sound of can it be?  Jim going through files and getting rid of things.  Hooray!  And then going to my laptop and seeing that LabCorp has a message for me as does Montgomery Internal Medicine.  So my lab test is done and normal.  

It appears that we will have more furniture than what will fit in the dining area/ study.  We can get rid of the chest of drawers which Jim is emptying and never was in good shape.  We may have to get rid of one of the bookshelves.  Jim’s chair where he reads Hebrew every morning with a cup of coffee on the large wooden arms—that is a priority!  Byron Movers will take away furniture that we cannot use and even books if Jim cannot give his excess to students or sell it to the Brooklyn book dealer who is not responding to his emails.  (Although he had appeared to be willing to come here to buy books)

My goal for today is to get rid of clothes I don’t like.  I might lose enough weight to get into some things again, but maybe that is too optimistic.  I should go through books again.  Going through children’s books yesterday was hard.  Too many good memories of reading books to our kids—and even some I saved from my childhood.  Little Black Sambo?  Papa Small?  Susan and the Rain?  I know the phrase is to keep only the things that give you joy but these old books do give me joy! If I don’t get rid of them now, our children will have to get rid of them when we are gone. 

September 23. Not much more progress today except to add things to the Green Drop collection.  Jared, the president of Byron Movers, says he will be in contact with Stonebridge to set our date so I let that go for today at least. `I despair when I keep finding more things to get rid of—note cards that were sent to us with pleas for funds.  Some went into the waste basket; others in a plastic bag for Green Drop.  If someone wants them, great.  If not, they can throw them out. 

September 25.  After my checking in with our primary care provider and Jared at Byron Movers, Jim heard from Dawn, the nurse at Stonebridge.  They are missing some information so she is sending Jim a release form and then she will pursue what she needs to know. Meanwhile, we have an appointment with her on October 5 so we are making progress.  (Jim just took photos of the release forms and sent them to Dawn.  I hope that will facilitate the process.)

I fear this is all going to get pushed into November which will mean another month’s rent at Barclay Square.  But maybe not.  Meanwhile, every day we both find more stuff to throw into the recyclable bin or send off to Green Drop.  Or, happily, our son Dan claimed three books from his childhood, Richard Scarry, Winnie the Pooh, and a very old Hardy Boy volume.  He and Alex are also going to be given our Dr. Spock book from 1972 and a very funny book someone gave us before Jeff was born called “How to Raise Children at Home in Your Spare Time.” 

I was hoping to post this blog post when we had a move in date.  Now I know that will not even be set until after October 5.  I can’t move it any faster.  We have the rest of our lives to live at Stonebridge and I will try to be content right here today in our lovely apartment at Barclay Square.

September 28. Green Drop came today for the third time and took five or six boxes and bags from our entryway.

Jared from Byron Home gave us move in dates of October 28 and 29.  I was pleased.  But then Francesca from Stonebridge emailed with the fact that we need up to date EKGs and Jim needed up to date bloodwork-which may not be easy to get by Monday when we were supposed to see the nurse.  I feel as if it is one step forward and two steps back.  Jim may have to hold off on breaking our lease lest we end up homeless having to leave here in 35 days after handing in. 

And then I open two more closets and see blankets that we don’t need and scrapbooks that I forgot we had.  We may need to get Green Drop to come again.  I am going to be so glad when this move is done and we are settled into our new home.  

Laura and Susan were planning Thanksgiving.  I hope we are all settled by that time and that we are welcoming a little baby boy into our family and being thankful for both those milestones!

September 30. It made me sad to put the woolen blanket that has been with us for years into a bag for Green Drop.  I remember it being on my parents’ bed.  But Laura said she would take the “vintage” blanket and that pleases me.  

We were able to get into MIM for EKGs this afternoon and Jim is fasting 8 hours today so he can do bloodwork.  Francesca emailed not to stress!  What will be the next obstacle is what I am thinking? 

Burdened by Books

 We are in the process of downsizing and I told myself I would go over my many books in the second bedroom today and give away some more.  We gave five bags to the library earlier this week—the maximum they would take.  We estimated that to be 85 books for tax purposes.

So I went to the shelves this morning and tried to get rid of some. I came up with two books and that is all.  I pull a book  off the shelf and remember how much I enjoyed it and how I might want to read it again.  I pull another unread book off the shelf and read the summary on Goodreads and think I would be happy to give it another try.  Many of the books I read and had rated five stars and gave great reviews.  How can I part with them?  

My life will not be long enough to read all these books.  And then I am tempted by buying still more for my Kindle app or checking out more from my “To Read Later” list at the library.  I am thankful for the joy of reading but right now I feel overwhelmed by my ambition to read and reread. 

————And then there are all of Jim’s books.  He may sell some to a Brooklyn bookseller, he will probably give many away to Princeton Seminary students or Princeton University graduate students.  The book dealer has been in contact with him; he needs to contact the students.  What is left, Byron Movers says they will give to some organization.  And a good many will make the move with us and will be left someday for our offspring to dispose of. 

Downsizing Again

 Seven years ago when we moved to Princeton, we got rid of so much stuff.  Books, clothes, furniture, papers—much of it found good homes because we had time to get rid of it.  I had book give-aways at church and was happy to see friends leave with books I had once loved.  Jim gave many volumes to a Theological Book Network.  I gave old bridesmaids’ dresses to the school corporation’s costume shop.  The family that bought our house bought lots of furniture from us.  We told them to make us an offer and when they did, we told them it was too much.  We were happy to leave a lot behind and that they could use many large items. 

This morning I asked Jim whatever happened to the beautiful illuminated manuscript Bible we had from St. John’s Abbey.  It was an oversized volume and we can’t remember what Biblical book it was.   I hope we gave it to a good home.  I wish we had kept it!

And I remembered high heeled shoes I can no longer wear and purses I haven’t used for years; there is a box of memories from the growing up years of the offspring in the garage; I filled up another box for Green Drop to pick up.  There are so many pieces of artwork that I treasure but have never hung on the walls here.  So much stuff.  

————-I went through a container of pills in the closet and we now have a bag full of expired drugs to try to get rid of safely at Walgreen’s tomorrow. There are old toothpaste and toothbrushes from years of dental visits under the sink in the master bathroom.  

I looked in the closet in the yellow bedroom and saw six framed pieces of artwork from our offspring’s childhood.  They are treasures to me but I hope the artists themselves will claim what they did.  Not really sure who did what because they are unsigned. 

———Laura claimed one and Dan claimed another.  Progress!  

It will all get moved and then can still be sorted.  But right now it all seems overwhelming.  Maybe by Thanksgiving we will be all settled into our new home.  Maybe by Christmas!  And for that matter, where will the Christmas box of ornaments and lights be stored?  Not in a garage like it is now.  Maybe in the storage cage Stonebridge mentioned.  

————If you are reading this,  I think I need some some encouragement that we are doing the right thing.  

The Road to Stonebridge is not Smooth

 I guess this title sounds a lot like last week’s blog entry.  But there are new problems as the previous ones get solved.

Monday we saw our Primary Care Provider Dr. Delacruz.  We gave him the lengthy forms to be filled out for Stonebridge.  We were pleased and he was pleased that neither of us needed EKGs or bloodwork because they had been done recently enough.  We had blood drawn for a TB test which was quite extensive—four little vials each.  Jim dutifully did his urine sample and I asked to do it at home.

It took until Thursday to get the TB test results after some puzzling posts from LabCorp.  Jim got his urinalysis results back but I did not.  Yesterday I checked with MIM (Montgomery Internal Medicine) and Jill, a very dear and competent aide, said it went in and just wait a day.  Today I checked with our sales representative Francesca Fogg at Stonebridge and she told me that Jim’s forms were faxed in, but mine were not. I followed up again at MIM and Jill found out that LabCorp could not locate my specimen.  So I have to give it another try on Monday. We will meet with the nurse at Stonebridge once our forms are in for her approval that we are “independent.”  

Meanwhile the moving company Stonebridge recommends is coming for our “free consultation” on Monday and we cannot set a date until all my forms are in and Stonebridge gives us a date.  Francesca said it would be OK to commit to them because this should not delay it much. We can commit but not to a definite date at this point. 

The timing of all of this is problematic.  Dr. Delacruz signed the form to help us break our lease here at Barclay Square.  But once that is in, we have 40 days left and we have to be out five days before that.  So really, 35 days after handing in that form.  So the movers have to come within that time frame and we need a place to go!  Jim thinks those five days are for them to clean carpets and clean the apartment all on our bill.  

I will feel relieved when we have a moving date.  We hope not to pay another month’s rent in November but we just may have no choice.  We hope to get our deposit back here and happily Stonebridge takes $3000 off your first month’s fees toward moving expenses.  I guess this gives Jim more time to find homes for more of his books.  I would love to have an overnight trip to the shore to celebrate and just get away.  I hope the next blog is full of definite plans!  

This is Not Easy!

Every day we make some progress toward a move to Stonebridge.  We signed papers of application this morning with Francesca Fogg and we handed over application fees and a deposit on our apartment.  After a little delay, the money was transferred into our account. (Although it says “pending.”) We saw a draft of the letter we will use to break our lease but that won’t be available until we get our medical forms filled out and the nurse at Stonebridge meets with us.  So we don’t have a move-in date yet. We chose carpet for the bedrooms.  We turned down the beautiful shelving and cabinets for now and can always add them later.  I am thinking the black bookshelves we have in the hall here can line a wall in the living room and that solves the problem of how to get rid of them.  

Byron Movers called this am and assured me they have availability in October yet.  So I hope we can get one of those dates.  But that cannot be settled until we get our medical forms completed along with the TB test and maybe other tests.  I had an EKG in January and hope that will do.  Jim has not had one for a while I think.

I set a goal of going through one shelf of books in the yellow bedroom each day.  I found book after book that I loved and thought I might reread.  I found only a very few that I put in the bag to donate to the library.  

Then I made myself go through a box of work related files and files from classes I took over the years.  That too was painful and I had to recycle papers that represented important information or lots of work at the time. I found thank you notes from students that were heartwarming.  I kept them!

Then there were the boxes of letters I had saved including heartfelt ones I sent to Jim when we were dating, the summer I was in Wheaton and he was in Kalamazoo.  I kept them back in their box and put it in the cedar chest.  

I hear Jim going up and down the steps to the garage and think he has begun sorting through his books as to which ones he wants to keep and which ones he can give to seminary students or sell to the Brooklyn bookstore owner. I know he finds that painful too. 

Yesterday I was in a panic mode as to what we could do with the large metal shelving in the garage.  Eboni said we could not leave it there for the next tenant.  Jeff said he could probably use it in their basement and could even put it in his van.  Problem solved! I am relieved until the next problem pops up!

 We had guests for supper last night and I thought that would be my last time for hosting a meal that I prepared.  I fixed a delicious salad supper and it went over very well.  I do not regret leaving that part of my life behind.  Our guests said they were expert movers and would help in any way we needed.  Just their reassurance was helpful!

——————I feel as if when we get one issue settled, more appear.  We got a big packet of move in information and forms from Stonebridge which ask for copies of our power of attorney forms, end of life forms, all our physicians and even our funeral home!  We have not gotten that far in our planning. It also had a page with getting to know you information requested—like what were our biggest accomplishments in life and what did we look forward to at Stonebridge.  I think I am not into that much sharing!  Not even my birthday for their lobby.  Besides the funeral home, there were other sobering requests.  Could they share our new address if we moved into a hospital or other nursing care?  Could they share the name of the funeral home when we die?  I am very aware that this is the end of the road for us—and for others.  We will get to know folks and then be sad when they are gone.  I had some real cold feet yesterday after looking over that packet.  But we are committed and it still seems like we cannot turn it down.  

A Big Move Coming Soon!

 

I had been concerned about new neighbors moving in downstairs again—our 6th new neighbors in seven years.  We had been told by a friend that a single man with a dog had looked at the place.  We did not know if he took it.  We thought this complex had a no pets policy as it was when we moved in but that may have changed.  Eboni, our leasing agent, informed me that barking dogs and noisy children were what you could expect in a multifamily place.  

So I called Stonebridge and told them that we could put our names in for a two bedroom place not just the two bedroom plus a nook or den that we had specified.  Tara hinted that would move our name up.  And so it did.  We got the call yesterday and went in to look at Number 107. It was a lovely apartment with two bedrooms and a large dining area which we would split up for eating and Jim’s study.  It had a fireplace and a screened in patio and two bathrooms.  We have to accept it within a week.

I am overwhelmed with what has to be done and typical of me, lay awake thinking of it last night.  I made a list and eventually got some sleep.  I got to work this morning.  I made an appointment with our doctor to get his OK for breaking our lease due to my lack of mobility and also to have him fill out the form that says we are independent and can take care of ourselves.  Jim called our financial planner in South Bend and got money transferred for our deposit which will be due on Thursday. 

These payments are not small amounts, but this apartment is considerably less than the one we specified earlier—both as an initial fee and monthly fees.  So that is a plus. And we have the funds thank God.  Our man in South Bend kept telling us over the years to spend what we had and we really did spend for  everything we wanted or needed.  But now it is good to have the funds to buy into an expensive life style.

We made choices to get the life care option so we could move into more advanced care if needed.  We also chose the 80% refund to our estate when the time comes. Both of those options make the initial cost higher. 

I felt better after emptying out several drawers in the yellow bedroom desk and putting my mostly purged journals of many years in one of them.  Lots of medical and prescription information went into the recyclable container.  Travel information may need another look before I get rid of it.  No one seems to want our soprano and alto recorders.  That may go to Green Drop for another pickup time.  

I emailed church to see if they were still collecting winter coats as we have not worn our woolen dressy coats for several years.  No need to move them.  The beautiful red dress I bought at Loehman’s in Durham years ago and wore to the State Department banquet honoring Jeff with his Math Olympiad teammates—I hate to give it up but maybe a photo will do.  I haven’t worn it for years.  (I didn’t put it in the Green Drop box but they did take the winter coats.)

We downsized seven years ago and don’t have as much to do this time.  And we won’t have to find new doctors and a dentist and a church and a library.  It’s all very scary but I am thinking of it as an adventure that we can thankfully do together at this point.  

September 5. One step at a time.  I scheduled Green Drop to come on September 14 and we will have several items for them again—a suitcase and matching travel bag, a golf cart, maybe the recorders, and a bag of clothes.

Laura says she will take the 100 year old rocking horse if the parents of the little one coming in November do not want it.  

Jim says he will contact the bookshop owner in Brooklyn who is interested in buying his books and will make a trip out here to look at them.  But first he has to go through them and see what he definitely wants to keep.  And he will have local students see what they want. 

Jim has contacted our financial planner in South Bend and we will have the money available by next Thursday for the down payment.  

I have a lot more peace of mind about this big move than I had in the middle of the night a few nights ago!  

————At our happy hour I asked Jim if we were going to take this apartment on Thursday and he said we were.  Now just to get our lease broken.  But both Eboni and Frencesca seemed to think that would not be a problem.  

I asked Jim to check out my addition to this blog post and he said it is a good thing we are recording all of this.  That is my primary motivation for this blog—a record of our lives that becomes a scrapbook of sorts in January when I have a book made of these posts. 

Put it on the Portal

 The ice maker was not letting us get ice.  It has been jammed for a while but we could at least reach in and get some ice but even that was not working well.  So this morning Jim “put it on the portal” for Barclay Square maintenance to come and fix it.  He warned me to get out of bed and ready for visitors because they can come quickly.

And so they did.  Within a very short time, Adriano and Tony were here.  There was a problem with the computer in the refrigerator and freezer and we hope it is now working just fine.  

This is why apartment life is the right thing for us at this stage of our lives.  No problems thinking of who to call for repairs, for a long wait, for high fees.  We pay plenty in rent but it makes our lives easier and we are grateful.

Now for the next step.  When will Stonebridge call? What will they offer us?  Another move is very daunting and it is much easier to stay right here.  And it is a big financial investment to go into a continued care facility.  But at age 80, it is probably the best thing for us to do when the time comes.

Third Injection

 I just did my third Mounjaro injection.  Each time it is a little different—the first time, well over ten seconds between clicks, this time about two seconds.  But we can see a little puncture wound and the plunger is visible in the apparatus.

The first week went deceptively smoothly.  Then I had a delicious grilled burger with the Conways on Friday night and after I took my last pills of the day, I began to feel like there was a rock in my stomach.  That lasted until about 2 am when I fell asleep.  The next day, Saturday, is always our day for grocery shopping and meal planning.  I felt as if the thought of food was revolting.  I could not think of anything that sounded good to buy but we needed to eat.  I was very sad and so aware of how important food is in our lives and how, in many ways, food is a reward. 

In the early afternoon, I had a voice mail from the pharmacy at Walgreens.  I thought I better return the call and it was the pharmacist calling to ask if I had any questions about Mounjaro.  I thought that was so kind.  I told him I was sad about finding thoughts of food so unappealing and he said that was very typical.  I was so hoping the next three months were not going to be like this.

And blessedly, the next day was better and this past week has been better.  I have enjoyed my food again and tried to be careful about not eating a lot.  I even had a few sips of wine with meals.  Jeff and Susan brought pizza one night this week and that tasted great and had no ill effects.

I hope that the side effects don’t get worse with each injection as they did after the second one.  But at least I know that I got over the worst of the indigestion and the despair over planning and cooking and eating.  And in any case, this is what I have to do to bring that A1C down to pre-diabetes levels.  I may have lost one pound but no more.  I have left food on my plate a few nights but didn’t feel like I usually overate before this regime.  I have a ways to go to lose 12 pounds by November 3 as Dr. Delacruz predicted.  Weight loss will help my back strain and make it easier for me to walk greater distances.  I may have lost one pound.  

Again,  TMI for most of my blog readers but Jim and I like using this blog and the book we make of it as a record of our lives and this has been our life this week!  

A Week of Doctors and Drugs

 This will be TMI for my blog readers but it will be good to record a consequential week for Jim and me.  It started with my “wellness visit” with Dr Delacruz last week and the phone call the next morning to tell me that after many years of pre-diabetes, I had gone over the border.  I scheduled an appointment for a “treatment plan” the next Monday.  

That treatment plan was to be Mounjaro once a week-to lower the A1C and also to lose weight so that my back strain would lessen.  Dr. Delacruz demonstrated the use of the injection and said it was “easy-peasy.”

Getting the prescription was not easy.  CVS was out of it so I asked Montgomery Internal Medicine to send it to Walgreens.  Then CVS said they had it but couldn’t fill it because someone else had filled it.  Eventually I got the injections at Walgreens for $308!  I hate the Mounjaro ads on TV with the fat people dancing and now I am one of them—not dancing and not all that happy about it either! 

Last night we began our Mounjaro adventure.  Jim read me the instructions step by step.  It did not go perfectly as we waited for the second click and it did not happen.  I put the shot next to my abdomen again and it did click.  We could see a little puncture wound and Jim saw the grey plunger in the shot apparatus so we figured it must have happened.

And…I was aware of my stomach later in the evening—and was not tempted to snack during the night as I often am when I am lying awake.  So we shall see how the next week progresses.  I hope not with too much nausea and indigestion.  In three months I see Dr. Delacruz again and he thought I would lose 12 pounds by that time!  

Plus Jim had a routine ENT visit in which his bp was high.  So he will see Dr. Delacruz this afternoon to see if he needs to do anything about that.  It was not emergency high, just elevated. (Jim’s bp was OK at the follow-up visit.)

Oh, and we did have shingles vaccines  too at the Plainsboro CVS.  We had no reaction to that except a bit of soreness on our arms. (And I had some unusual fatigue two days later.)

We are thankful we have places to go when we need medical help and we do trust Dr. Delacruz for good counsel.  

A Tsumani of Loose Ends

 I don’t like loose ends.  I like closure.  This has been a few days with too many issues—not all that important—but too many loose ends.

I was convinced by an ACLU post in my email to give them $100 online.  Jim happened to be checking our credit card that day—the 20th of the month—and asked if I meant to give ACLU $100 four times.  No!  I called and talked to Vicki who was so appreciative of my being a long time supporter and so sorry for the error.  She said it would be fixed and they would call or email me. A few days later, there were no emails or calls but Jim said the credit card statement no longer had those four $100 gifts as “pending.”  They were gone.  I had thought if they didn’t go away, it was a worthwhile cause to stop our president.  The ACLU had argued successfully before the Supreme Court on the birthright issue.  But it is better that the mistake be corrected.  I will give to them again but I fear doing so.  Vicki told me to do it by phone but I don’t see how that would prevent errors if someone codes it in wrong.

Jim got his real ID in the mail several days ago but I did not.  He looked on our temporary IDs and it says that if you don’t get yours in 20 days, there is an email address to contact.  So I will be patient and hope this is not an issue and mine is lost somewhere in the postal system.  (Hooray!  July 27–my real ID came in today’s mail!)

Jim said we had two Amazon Prime Video charges this month and how did we have two accounts?  I do a yearly Amazon Prime charge in November to get our free shipping and that is probably worth it for the convenience of ordering.  But two video charges?  It is possible that one is for BritBox and one for Premium Amazon. He cancelled the premium charge with some difficulty and we will see if we can still get the TV sports that we want to watch.  And BritBox?  We used to enjoy some shows and should look them up again for a few laughs.  (In fact, we just watched with great amusement the first show of season 5 of Shakespeare and Hathaway—worth the monthly fee!)

Then there was my new hair styler with puzzling instructions on a sheet that was printed so faintly that it could hardly be read.  But my patient husband helped me figure it out and the styler that has been sitting in its box for a month or more can be used the next time I wash my hair.

We had two additional $45 charges on a email statement from the wedding hotel for getting early check-in even though the kind clerk said she had removed said charges because we had called that morning.  But those charges did not come through on the last credit card statement so that was settled too.

I guess the lesson here is to always be aware of the charges on one’s accounts and to be careful about what one is signing up to give or buy.  I appreciate my husband’s patience on all these issues.  Our lives are so involved in technology that it is easy to make mistakes on our part and that of others. 

A Passport and a Real ID

 We have no travel plans but I was motivated to get a passport out of fear that President Trump was going to make it difficult for me to vote next November by requiring a birth certificate and another document that gave my married name. And I definitely want to vote to get opposition in place to that man!

  I had my photo taken at the UPS store and with some trial and error, filled out the form to get a passport.  It was not possible to renew a passport at any of our local post offices. And the online form seemed problematic to me. Our daughter-in-law Susan who always has good advice suggested we take the forms to the Rocky Hill Post Office where parking is easy and the staff is not busy and had been helpful to her in the past.  We took her advice and it worked out so well.  The clerk knew exactly where the forms had to go and how to safely mail them.  So for $130 for a passport and $12.99 for mailing, off they went. And the renewed passport came back in the mail one day before our appointment for a real ID at our local BMV.

And that was another process I dreaded.  We went over the requirements more than once and put them in two folders, one for each of us.  I had a SS card with my present name so that was helpful. Jim’s SS card printed up a variation on his middle name which concerned him.  I had a birth certificate and marriage certificate and we found utility bills in each of our names with our present address.

The lines were long at the BMV but the staff was amazingly efficient and patient and we were in and out of there within 45 minutes.  The clerk did notice the discrepancy for Jim’s name and brought it to the attention of his superior, but it passed anyway.  My clerk did not even use my new passport but felt the other certificates would be easier for the typist to read.  So for $11 dollars each, we have temporary real IDs and will get the permanent ones in the mail in a few weeks.  We have no plans to fly anywhere, but if the need arises, we will be OK. 

These two procedures caused me some anxiety but both turned out well.  We had carefully prepared for both. And the people at UPS, the post office, and the BMV were competent and helpful.  And we won’t have to do it again for a long time, maybe never! 

Katie and Eli Got Married!

 My preparations were nothing compared to what others had to do but they caused me some stress.  My “cocktail dress” was going to be too tight because I gained far too much weight in the last year.  But I had another dress in the closet, never worn, and needing a hem.  So I hemmed and pressed that and knew it would be comfortable.  I realized that I needed a slip and the only ones I had were midi length or black.  But Amazon came through with a next day shipping—even if the order was delayed probably due to the flooding of our roads.Then there was a haircut on Friday and the difficulty in scheduling an early check-in from the hotel.  

The weekend started on Saturday at the Princeton University’s Prospect House with a brunch hosted by Jeff and Susan.  It was a lovely setting in the Alan Turing Garden Room—a long walk for me from the parking lot but I made it!  Jeff noted that I “worked the room” and I did mingle and chat with people I knew and didn’t know.  

We were not planning on going to the rehearsal dinner  Saturday evening but Susan seemed to think we were included and offered to pick us up.  It seemed a bit overwhelming to me but Jeff was disappointed that we were not going, so we said thanks and took advantage of their taking care of us again.  It was a nice dinner at the Ryland Inn, the wedding setting, and there were various toasts from parents and friends.

Sunday morning Jim called the Hyatt House and got us a 2 pm check which made it easier to get to the rehearsal at 3.  Katie wanted the grandparents there to practice the procession.  And yes, it was important because we were the pace setters and the first ones in.  I set a slow enough pace with my cane in hand.  The weather was great after the previous week’s heat and storms.  The wedding coordinator was no nonsense and gave everyone their orders. 

Jim had a role in reading I Corinthians 13 which he did well.  The other reader was cousin Erin who is a rabbi in training and she read Ruth’s promise to Naomi in Hebrew and English.  

Katie was beautiful and the vows were original to each other and very touching.  Eli was quite emotional in reading his vows.  We were amused when he said that his roommates upon meeting Katie warned him “don’t mess up!”

Photos took a long time during cocktail hour and then there was a sit down dinner in which we sat with the Conways and the Moorheads.  There was dancing and toasts during the evening.  Katie and Eli’s dance was a big hit as they put on quite the choreographed show with lifts. I did  join in the Hora where Katie and Eli were lifted high on chairs in the middle of our big dance circles.  

It is hard to converse in noisy rooms.  We were happy enough to be in our quiet hotel room around 9:30 pm.  As always, I didn’t sleep well but got in a few hours and was glad to have Jim in charge of driving home this morning—after one last good-bye breakfast at the hotel.

Seven Years

It’s an anniversary for us today!  On June 30, 2019 we left South Bend for Princeton, New Jersey.  We left the AirBnB where we had been living for a month.  Our house in Granger sold so quickly that we had to move out before we planned to do so.  We found a place right next to the Notre Dame campus that we think was a prime rental for football weekends.  There must have been ten football posters on the walls. We spent that month saying good-bye to friends and good-bye to our community for 28 years.

Then on July 1, we moved into our next transitional housing at Homewood Suites just a short ride from the Barclay Square Apartments in Princeton, New Jersey where our lease began on July 17.   We spent two weeks signing up for utilities, WiFi,  library cards, driver’s licenses, and buying the necessities that we had not moved—mattresses and many bookshelves.  

Our earthly goods all arrived on time and in good condition on an incredibly hot day.  The poor movers worked hard and the A/C could not keep up with the demand for several days.  Our family all showed up for a house warming party that weekend  with time in the apartment pool and was it pizza? And we do remember the ice cream cake that wouldn’t fit in the freezer so we had to cut it in half.

It took some time to find a church, and to find medical personnel that we liked and trusted.  And there were some hard times ahead with Jim’s prostate cancer diagnosis and then the Covid pandemic that affected all our lives—even if Jim and I never succumbed to the disease itself.  

But seven years later, we can still say we really like our lovely apartment and are finding it difficult to think of uprooting ourselves for continued care senior housing.  We are so happy to be nearer our children and some of our grandchildren.  One family is just ten minutes away; another about an hour, and the third sadly some further about 2 12 hours.  But all of that is so much better than 700 miles.

We miss South Bend friends and our church—and the opportunities on Notre Dame’s campus.  But we have not regretted our move and can celebrate seven years in our new home!

A Very Sociable Week

 I read advice for those of us who are very senior citizens emphasizing the importance of social contact to prevent dementia and maybe just to encourage longevity.  Seven years ago we left a community where we had many friends and acquaintances and a church where we literally knew everyone.  We made a move to be closer to children and grandchildren and have not been sorry.  But it takes time to feel a part of a new community and a new church.  This week I have been reminded of our progress in that regard!

Sunday while waiting for Jim to park the car and join me in the pew, two people came up to me to chat.  Later we were joined in our pew by a young family we had gotten to know.  We met all of these folks through joining small study groups over the last few years.  We did our part to feel a part of a large congregation and it was good.

Sunday afternoon our former neighbors came over for a happy hour.  We have gotten together with them several times since they moved away.  Best of all, we celebrated their wedding with them over a year ago.  

Tuesday evening we went to a lecture at our church as a part of a series commemorating the 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence.  We sat with friends and then walked to a restaurant in Palmer Square to have dinner together.  These folks have invited us to their home more than once and we have enjoyed restaurant meals with them also.  Again, we met them through small groups at church—twice when we were hosts.

Then this morning, old friends came over for coffee and muffins.   These were friends from Raleigh days with whom we have been able to renew friendships.  We raised children together years ago and now we have grown children and grandchildren to enjoy.  Again, they are part of our church community.

A new friend of mine had surgery this week.  I am past the stage of my life of cooking meals for folks, but we went to Trader Joe’s and bought several of our favorite items and left them at her doorstep along with a TJ’s bouquet of flowers.  She has referred to this kind of purchase as “assisted living” in our own style and so it is.  She said she felt spoiled eating our favorite coffee cake and my favorite chocolate mints.  

Jim has his usual partners for golf each week and plays with one gentleman whose scores are almost the same as his.  They keep score but it is a friendly competition and they are good partners.

So are we preventing dementia and encouraging longevity?  Maybe so, but at least we are happy to have new friends and sociability in our lives.

Lamorial: Everything They’ll Need

 I assume Lamorial is a play on Tutorial or Memorial.  I saw it online and paid my money and had it sent to me, knowing that sometimes these online purchases are a big mistake.  I don’t think this one is.  The idea is to get all your passwords, accounts, access—all in one place.  So that if I outlive Jim, I can get into our accounts.  I find it all overwhelming and maybe this will help.

I have set a goal of doing one page each day.  It is not fun and we both get a bit tense about it—with Jim trying to find his user IDs and passwords which are all foreign words—they are nonsensical for me.  I have a few user IDs myself and passwords—and had to retrieve what I had from the Indiana Retired Teachers Fund where I have a small pension.  I had to create a new password because I had not accessed it online before.

Fortunately, we can skip the mortgage page and debts.  There are several bank accounts and two credit cards of which I use only one—but it is good to have a backup one and Jim does use that one.  We have some monthly subscriptions but one or the other of us would probably continue those.  (Amazon Prime, NYT) and a couple of automatic charity withdrawals. 

We have a few more pages to go and then have to find a good place to put this important volume, a place that our executor Jeff can retrieve it when we are both gone.   I am thinking that maybe the next step will be to try to access each account to see if those user IDs and passwords are accurate.

It is a painful process but probably worth doing.  There are instructions as to what to do first.  There are places to put down phone numbers for our financial advisors (one local, one in South Bend).  

Laura’s 25th Reunion

Laura was celebrating her 25th reunion from Princeton this week.  She asked if she could spend the night Thursday and of course, we were happy to have her.  It all turned out to be more of an adventure than she anticipated.

I asked her to text us when she was leaving the campus and I was in my “mother” mode and worried about her walking alone on the dark streets.  She did text us when leaving and then when she got into her car but warned us that her key fob was almost out of power and although she got the car started by putting it right next to the ignition, that it could be a problem if she parked behind our garage thus blocking us in.

There didn’t seem to be any other parking places nearby so we chanced it.  Jim googled how to replace a battery because he remembered it being an issue with one of our fobs.  Fortunately, she was able to start the car in the morning and Jim drove her to CVS to get the correct battery.  It was replaced and she was able to get back to campus for a lunch and then a 4 pm session with a 95 year old John McPhee who was one of her writing professors 25 years ago.  How lovely for him to have a group out to his home.  I will be eager to hear more about that.  I remember reading someone saying that he had the gift of making each student feel like he or she was just the greatest student ever.  

Today was the P-rade and Michael sent a video of the whole family with their signs and Princeton gear ready to march in the rain.  Not a good day for reunion celebrations!

I’ll try to include a photo of Laura in her orange blazer.  Sometimes this works; sometimes it doesn’t!

Family and Friends

 

It has been a weekend for enjoying and being thankful for family and friends.  Saturday was grandson Michael’s graduation from George Washington University.  We joined the ceremony by livestream and were able to see Michael walk across the stage and hear his name read with his majors in music and psychology.  Sunday was granddaughter Ruth’s confirmation at Bryn Mawr Presbyterian Church.  We again joined by livestream and were able to hear Ruth say her vows with 15 other young people and to hear her name called.

Mark Noll, our friend from South Bend and Notre Dame, was the inaugural lecturer in a series on Presbyterians and the American revolution in our church, Nassau Presbyterian, on Sunday afternoon.  A graduate student brought him to our apartment and we enjoyed having lunch together and spending time visiting.  We got him to church plenty in time for his lecture at 4 pm and were able to greet Maggie, his wife, and my dear walking buddy from South Bend days.

On Monday Jim golfed with Eli, Katie’s fiancée and I met my good friend Peggy at the apartment playground for a chat.  It was very hot and not the best weather for golf but they enjoyed the round and I enjoyed the visit.

Monday morning we got a text from granddaughter Katie inviting us for a celebration dinner for her mom’s birthday and Michael’s graduation.   We were happy to say Yes.  I offered to bring my usual brownies but Katie had made a cake and decorated it for the occasion.  So we joined Katie, Eli, Jeff, Susan, and Michael for supper.  That means just a ten minute ride into Princeton, not a 700 mile trip like it used to be for family events.

We came home and watched a double overtime game in which the Spurs beat Oklahoma City Thunder and we read about the Mets win in the 12th inning with a score of 16-7.  A great sports night!

Mother’s Day

I have not blogged since April 25.  Sometimes it seems there is plenty to write about; other times not so much.  But today is the day after Mother’s Day so that gives me something to say.

First,  I am so thankful to be a mother and a grandmother.  That did not come without complications and delays but we are so blessed to have three children with three wonderful spouses and eight grandchildren.  I blogged about our wonderful family party for our 80th birthdays and I treasure the memory of that evening.  Our three children are spaced almost seven years apart and then five and a half years apart.  That is not the way we would have planned our family but it is the way we were given our family.  It has ramifications even now with the oldest three grandchildren all older than the youngest five.  

Jeff and Susan treated us to brunch at Triumph Brewery yesterday.  We walked there after church and sat on a bench in Palmer Square until the time of our reservation.  It was a beautiful spring day and there were families picnicking on blankets and children running happily around the grounds.  We had a lovely meal.  Jeff and Susan are always so good about making us feel welcome here in Princeton.  

Dan and Alex attempted a FaceTime call and somehow we missed it.  But we called them around 7 and made plans to visit in early June—when Alex is back from a Philadelphia yoga convention and their newly repaired roof should be finished.  Laura sent flowers and called.  Michael is with his mother in North Carolina along with his siblings.  I am happy for Grandma Di that she could get her entire offspring together.  Michael sent a photo of the beautiful scenery along with his wishes for a happy Mother’s Day.

So I heard from everyone—even granddaughter Katie who hoped we had a good lunch.  I felt loved and remembered.  

What You Should Have Read by Age 80

 I have been giving this idea some thought and then today’s NYT Book Review features exactly such an article.  I reject more books than I read each week.  I bring three or four books  home from the library and do well if I read two of them.  I download books for my Kindle app and delete many of them.  I have plenty of time to read but I don’t care to read anything that is not interesting and worth reading.  In the last few months, I have had much pleasure in rereading a series of books—the Maisie Dobbs mysteries by Jacqueline Winspear.  And I enjoyed them very much even if the plots were familiar.  I was happy for Maisie all over again when she found love for the third time and adopted a precious and needy little girl.  And I lived through the two world wars with her in dangerous and difficult times in England.

So what have I never read?  Sometime “By the Book” in the NYT  will ask that question of the interviewee.  What classic have you never read?  Well, I have never read To Kill a Mockingbird.  I have tried a few times and I think I will try again.  I have never read the great Russian novels by Dostoevsky and I may not get to those with their great length.  Although, I will not say never.  I have tried to read The Power and the Glory by Greene more than once and gave up.  To his credit, Jim picked it up recently and did read the whole thing and Lawless Roads also by Greene recounting his own time in Mexico.  Middlemarch?  I tried and have no interest in trying again.  Anything by Faulkner?  I have Sartoris on my Kindle app now and will give it a try. Love in the Time of Cholera?  I tried and gave up although I may try again. I have read War and Peace, memorably while nursing a baby 42 years ago during the middle of the night.  Short chapters made it easy to pick up and read a bit at a time.  I read Moby Dick because I wrote a paper on it for Freshman English many, many years ago.  I have read The Great Gatsby more than once but not Fitzgerald’s other novels.  

I read mysteries for escape but draw the line at serial killers, true crime books, and those that feature “family secrets” or abuse.  But then mysteries that are too “cozy” are not worth reading either, and certainly not those that feature a dog or a cat as the detecting partner.  

What have I read with interest in the last few weeks?  Abigail and John: the Portrait of a Marriage, a wonderful biography that lead me to looking for other biographies of that era—Benjamin Rush, Samuel Adams, Aaron Burr, Alexander Hamilton (a young adult book was just right for me!).   How to Get Filthy Rich in Rising East Asia by Hamid, such a strange, intriguing title and a strange, intriguing book but I enjoyed it and even took a screen shot of one memorable page.

Right now I am almost finished with a book Surprised by Hope by NT Wright that has been worth reading.  But I read only one dense chapter at a time and try to take notes on it.  And I have requested a brand new book from our library and picked it up today—The Secrets of the Abbey, a Brittany Mystery by Bannalec that I am sure  to enjoy.

Downsizing (Again!)

A few nights ago I lay awake in bed thinking about all the stuff we needed to get rid of again in anticipation of a possible move to senior housing which may come up soon or may be far off.  We have a deposit down so we are on the list.  The place will not or cannot commit to how long it will take.  In any case, I felt overwhelmed by what we have once again accumulated or kept in the almost seven years we have lived in this apartment.  I wrote a list and then went to sleep.

So yesterday I went to work looking over what we had to get rid of.  Jim suggested we call “1-800  Got Junk” so I did and made a plan for them to come today to give us an estimate and take things away.  Suddenly last night we got a call that they were in the neighborhood and could they come by in 45 minutes?  Sure.  So we hauled several items to the door downstairs.  They arrived around 8 pm and looked them over and said it would be $249 to take them away.  I said if we knew it would be that much we would not have asked them to come.  They said what would you want to pay?  I said $100.  They called their manager and he agreed to that amount!  Jim did give them a tip for their efforts.  So the garage is a little emptier with the broken lamp and two broken lawn chairs gone.  And one old golf bag.  The old vacuum cleaner is out of the closet.  The broken suitcase is out of its permanent spot in the guest bedroom.  Plus several old electronics are gone—saving us the trip we were planning on to take to Best Buy to recycle.  

Now, there are all the books.  And the dishes and pottery in the china hutch.  And music.  And my old work items that I can’t seem to throw out when I think of all the effort it took to put them together years ago.  But we have made progress and will be glad we have started to do so when our name does come up at Stonebridge.

July 22 I was able to give Dan and Alex a box of pottery—bowls and platters—many of them made by the pottery studio at Notre Dame. So they meant something to me and I am glad to pass them on to people who mean something to me!

The Day After a Great Birthday

 

My celebrations started with my friend Peggy bringing me Lindor truffles and a lovely card.  How thankful I am to have made a new friend and such a good friend here in Princeton—and even right at Barclay Square.

I received cards from two other friends from South Bend and Raleigh and texts from several others.  My sister called and so did my friend Sue.  Jim wrote me a very loving birthday greeting and we picked out white tulips and a few chocolates at Trader Joe’s on Saturday.  My four oldest grandchildren all texted with birthday greetings.  Laura sent beautiful flowers and called.  Michael and little Henry sent two videos.  Alex and Dan called with FaceTime.  And we went out to eat at Seasons 52 with Jeff and Susan and they shared ice cream cake with us at our apartment afterwards.  

Did I miss anything?  It was a full day of feeling affirmed and I am grateful for it.  I can’t help but wonder what the year will bring.  Last year was the “year of the hip” and I am glad that is over.  I hope and pray there are no medical crises this year.  I have a feeling it might be a year of a big move to Stonebridge and more and more, I am ready for that adventure.  As Jim pointed out in his card, we can do it together and that is good. 

Water!

Thursday afternoon we got an email from Eboni, our “leasing consultant” in the 1900 Building who takes

care of us all.  We were told that a water main broke and all of South Brunswick was under an advisory to boil water or use bottled water.  We fortunately had bottled water in the apartment because Jim had been using it for the humidifier he uses when the furnace is running.  

But it was hard to remember to not put one’s toothbrush under the tap water.  Or to use hand sanitizer after “washing” one’s hands in tap water.  I carefully washed our fruit and vegetables with bottled water. At least we were able to flush toilets and take showers although Jim was very careful not to get the contaminated water in his eyes. 

At one point I emailed Eboni and said she probably never thought her job description would be to advise about water, to scold about recyclables, or to tell folks not to crash private parties.  I said I was smiling at her emails and hoped she was still smiling.  She responded that my email made her smile. Sometimes it seems like she has to be the mother for 220 families telling us to break down our boxes for recycling or not to crash private parties in the clubhouse or to move a car parked in a restricted space.  

We were very glad when the warning was lifted and we could wash our hands with joy not needing to use the smelly hand sanitizer afterwards.  It was reminder of how we take good water for granted.  

Hospers, Iowa

 A few days ago, I wandered over to Stuff in the Basement, a blog done by James Schaap, that I check out

every once in a while.  I appreciated his Good Friday post in which he showed a series of photos of the crucifixion.  Along with one from a mission in California and one from Rome, there was a statue from Hospers, Iowa.  Hospers, Iowa?  I was surprised and intrigued.  I emailed Mr. Schaap and got such a pleasant response.  The statue was in the cemetery across from the Catholic Church in Hospers.

I could not help but reminisce about the summer we spent in Hospers in 1972.  A few memories that I shared with Mr. Schaap brought back even more memories so here is a story about the lives of a young couple and their four month old baby—a summer in a parsonage in a town of 400 people in the middle of rich farm country.

Jim had finished a Fulbright year and was going to start Harvard in the fall.  We needed a place to live for the summer and an income.  He contacted Calvin Seminary and they placed him in a Christian Reformed Church in Hospers with the duty of preaching twice a Sunday and some visiting. 

It was an adventure for a city girl. Jim remembers the mayor who was a church member telling him that his goal was to keep Sunday softball out of Hospers.  I remember Jim was asked to judge the 4th of July parade because he knew no one and could be unbiased!  

I can’t picture the inside of the parsonage but I know there was a wringer washing machine in the basement.  A woman of the church taught me how to use it and for the next several weeks, I carefully did our laundry there remembering my mother’s warning about the danger of wringers.  I hung the clothes on the line, including many diapers, always aware that I was being watched by church members.  

We were given a lot of good food.  There was meat butchered from the farms and lots of sweet corn. There was more than what we could eat at times.  An older, wiser pastor told us to never turn it down but just say thank you and give it away if you needed to.  Or it would stop coming!

We were told that folks in town never locked their doors when people saw that we did take that precaution.  That was advice we did not heed having come from a rougher neighborhood in the middle of the city of Grand Rapids.  We faced a real problem when our Toyota died and needed a part that was nowhere to be found locally.  I don’t know where it got mailed from but it was about ten days that we were really confined to town.  I don’t remember how we got groceries during that time.  And how did I find books to read?  No Kindle app!

We were invited to a picnic at one farm.  The food was all out on a table outside with flies sitting on the food.  Literally a pigpen was feet away.  I tried to ignore my fears and just enjoy the feast and the company.

At the end of the summer, the church had a farewell for us and took up a collection with the warning that they hoped we could keep the faith when going to Harvard.  We did keep the faith in a much different setting but were glad to have had the experience of Hospers and yesterday I was glad for the reminder of that experience.  

A Contrast

Our pastor wrote a meditation for Easter Sunday in which he contrasted the mention of the dark in the gospel of John with the resurrection.  “While it was still dark,” the women went to the tomb.  I am thinking today has been a day of the very sad contrast between celebrating Easter and our president’s “expletive-ridden” Truth Social post in which he threatened Iran with bombing bridges and power plants and then mockingly said “Praise be to Allah.”  This was such a dark message on such a holy day.  Our pastor reminded us that “light shines in the darkness and the darkness cannot overcome it.”  He wrote “On Easter morning God’s resurrection people rise to shout into the world’s darkness and say, “No, no, no.  There is a better way.  Because Christ has risen.  He has risen indeed.”

We worshipped with grand music this morning and a powerful message.  We participated in the Lord’s table.  We even sang the Hallelujah Chorus as we always do on Easter morning.  Then we came home to a quiet dinner with just the two of us.  Our family is all traveling far and wide.  

So it was a good day.  But I grieve for our country and I am ashamed of our leadership and the ugly words that are our president’s way of commemorating Easter Sunday.  I pray for his change of heart every night. 

—————-Tuesday:  At 6:30 pm, there may be a two week cease fire.  Trump has threatened to end the Iranian civilization by 8 pm which is certainly a war crime and sounds like a threat of using nuclear power.  Iran may open the straights of Hermuz.  Pakistan may be the intermediary.  Whatever it is, there is a respite from destruction for now. There may be more calls for Trump to be removed from office which would be such a good thing.  

April 17 from Frank Bruni: his foul tirades demean the presidency, demean the country — demean every one of us — and it’s important that we never forget that. 

Good Friday 2026

 I have tried for several years to read an entire gospel or sometimes an epistle on Good Friday. One year I forgot and then did it on Easter Monday.  Another year I listened to one of Bach’s Passions.  Last year was a memorable year for this discipline but I couldn’t remember which gospel I read.  I think it was Matthew and I read it on my iPhone while going through the very stressful process of the nuclear stress test for my heart as a part of the preparation for hip surgery.  There was nothing wrong with my heart but the process was frightening as my heart was stimulated through a drug.  I guess because I was reading on my phone I did not record which gospel I read in our Bible.  However, I see that I had not read Luke since 2016 so that seemed a good book to read today—thankfully and mercifully just sitting in my “headquarters” as Jim calls it.

I have read the first ten chapters and am taking a break to shower and maybe do the livestream church service at noon.  I am reading on my iPad and using The Message, Eugene Peterson’s translation.  It is startling in its language of today.  As I often do, I thought can these words really be in Scripture?  I refer to the NRSV and sure enough, there they are in more traditional language.  So it is a good exercise to be reading a fresh translation and one that does not let me just slide over the words out of habit.

—————It’s now 1:45 and I have read the entire gospel and feel as if I have commemorated Good Friday and am leading up to Easter.  The church service at noon was all readings and music and was very solemn and ended up with the story of the tomb.  Now we wait for the celebration of Easter.  I hope we can worship in the sanctuary with trumpets and triumphal hymns and even the traditional Hallelujah Chorus.  

I was especially moved by the anthem “I Heard the Voice of Jesus Say:”

1. I heard the voice of Jesus say,
“Come unto Me and rest;
Lay down, O weary one, lay down
Thy head upon My breast.”
I came to Jesus as I was,
Weary, and worn, and sad;
I found in him a resting-place,
And he has made me glad.

It has been a year of feeling “weary and worn” more than once and I have come to Jesus “as I was.”  Now the year is over.  We don’t know what the next year may bring but I try to trust that God will go with us and we will have “a resting-place” again.

A Birthday Party

 

Last night there were 14 of us at dinner in a private dining room at Romeo’s Restaurant in Plainsboro gathered to celebrate our 80th birthdays—Jim’s was in February and mine is coming up in April.  We met with the owner on Wednesday to plan the menu. Romeo’s had the table set very nicely with black cloth napkins.  Jeff and Susan brought various items to celebrate—like a tiara and sash for me and a cap for Jim.  Laura had ordered huge balloons.  Our friends the Moorheads were able to join us but sadly the four oldest grandchildren were away at school or work.  

We chose a caprese salad and mozzarella sticks for a first course.  Jim and I brought wine from a morning trip to Trader Joe’s.  There were three entrees, spaghetti and meatballs, vodka rigatoni, and chicken parmigiana.  Each person ordered a dessert of choice from the menu.

I had made up a quiz for how well do you know your parents and grandparents and it went well with a lot of discussion and questioning and laughter.  

We felt very grateful for being able to celebrate with family.

 

12 Hours Without Power

 Last night there was a terrific wind and suddenly there was no power.  We were just getting into bed close to midnight.  We found the flashlight and knew that when the power came back on, we would be surprised with bright lights and loud signals.  But the power did not come back on.  I checked my phone around 1 am which was the only way to know the time and it gave an estimated time of 4:30 am for restored  power.  Then that got pushed back to 2:00 pm. 

 Jim had his annual physical at 9 am but the garage door opener was not functioning of course.  He was able to open the door manually which we had not done in the six years we lived here.  I tried to message him to pick up coffee at Burger King but with the internet down, that message did not go out.  However, he thought of that great idea himself and we got our drug of choice even if we enjoyed it a bit later than usual.  

With Jim gone and my cell phone out of power, I was more careful than usual not to fall.  I would have had no way of getting help until he got home.  It was so dark and disconcerting to walk into rooms and try to turn on a light foolishly!  We had guests coming at 4 pm and I was hoping to bake some almond bars but that had to wait.

11:44:  Suddenly the dining room lights brightened the apartment.  Power!  Hooray!  But we still had trouble with WiFi.  I suggested Jim turn the router off and on and that seemed to do the trick.  However, Xfinity messaged us later to say they restored WiFi at 4:50 pm.  

It was not cold at least  and we didn’t need to cook.  Jim took a quick shower before leaving home—while there was still some hot water in the tank.  I washed up with cold water later.  

How dependent we are on power!  I read my book for a while carefully finding a place where light was coming in a window.  During the night I opened the blinds just to have enough light from the sky to find my way to the bathroom.  

Our guests were at the Hampton Inn and were not aware of losing power.  Jeff said he was also not aware of losing power.  Maybe it was a very localized Barclay Square issue.  But we are glad it is over and we are in touch with the world again!

Celebrating the end of “The Year of the Hip”

The year began on March 3, 2025 when an x-ray came back as severe osteoarthritis and officially ended on March 3, 2026 but I was having too many problems with back muscle spasms to want to celebrate.  However, that has been much better the last few days so tonight we went to our usual place for celebrations—On the Border.  We were early enough to do the happy hour and today was a special for fajitas for two.  I thought I ordered a small margarita but there it was—the grande.  And it was good and a real treat after a month of no alcohol with my pharmacy of post surgery drugs.

I am able to walk without a cane or walker in the apartment.  I haven’t wanted to walk outside yet without some assistance but that time will come.  I am doing some exercises daily that Jennifer and Justin, my physical therapists,, taught me.  I am trying to walk at least a short ways daily.  Sadly, some bills are starting to arrive and there will probably be more asking for what insurance did not cover.  But the “year of the hip” is over and I am so grateful to be walking without pain and with more mobility.

A Bridal Shower

Katie’s maid of honor and bridesmaid gave her a lovely shower this afternoon. It was held at Chamber’s Cafe in Lawrenceville, about a twenty minute ride from Princeton.  Susan and Katie gave me a ride there and Alex gave me a ride home.  The room was decorated festively and there was a bingo card designed to help us mingle and get to know each other.  The buffet brunch was delicious.  I was thankful for Julie Weed’s help (Eli’s mom) because using a cane and filling a plate can be a challenge.  

The gift opening was going to be saved for later at Jeff and Susan’s house.  I was happy with my purchase of a mirrored vanity tray—very much like the one someone gave me at a bridal shower almost 60 years ago.  I hope Katie can use it and remember her grandma for many years to come! 

I was unsure if I would be able to make it to the shower with the back muscle spasms that have been bothering me this week.  But I did it and managed to forget them for most of the time.   

30 Days of Drugs

 I am taking the last of the many drugs prescribed for me for the aftermath of hip replacement surgery.

One was to coat the lining of my stomach to protect it from all the others.  One was an anti-inflammatory drug.  Two baby aspirin a day were to prevent blood clots.  And then there was the Tylenol—three times a day with three 275 mg pills.  Plus OxyContin which I did not take and an optional laxative.

I stopped the megadoses of the Tylenol a few weeks ago.  I was not having pain and did not want to take so many of them.  But I diligently took the other pills and recorded my doing so on a spread sheet lest I forget or overdose.  

And ….finally the day has arrived.  I am taking the last of the medications today.  Tomorrow I can have a glass of wine again-or maybe even celebrate with an On the Border margarita later this week!  In June, when I took the last of the 30 days of pills, my right hip started to hurt.  Apparently it had been protected by the Celebrix.  I have no more hips to be replaced.  I hope the knees and shoulders don’t start aching! I am so glad this day has arrived!

More Progress!

 

Yesterday was an important day in my recovery.  For the first time in many weeks, Jim and I went to get groceries together.  With a storm forecast for today, Trader Joe’s was so busy.  We have never stood in lines that long before to check out.  But we left with $140 with of food—many items that will be new and fun for us.  Plus some of our favorites like almond coffee cake and salmon and my almond granola—and our favorite ice creams and chips.  We know our prices and coffee and wine are usually good buys.  

I pushed the shopping cart which serves as a walker,  but I was not in pain as I have been so many times shopping before surgery.  I was very aware of my progress in recovery and very grateful.  

Maybe soon I will be walking farther without the cane as I am doing in the apartment now.  Maybe we can make that trip to the Princeton Art Museum that motivated me to face the surgery.  Sometimes I just stop and think that I no longer have to dread the surgery—it is over and I am healing well.  And I am thankful!

February 26:  An important big step—literally and figuratively.  I told Jennifer, my physical therapist, that today was my last day.  At some point, I may get another scrip and work on my core to ease an aching back but for now, I am done with the waits and the copay which has doubled this time around and the busyness of that big facility.  Jennifer is always cheerful and thanked me for allowing her to come along on my journey!  The business plan for her is to have three or four patients going at one time and it seems hectic even though she is calm.  I can do almost all the exercises at home with the exception of the recumbent bike.  I can make sure I do some good walks outside the apartment each day.  Jennifer suggested to keep hydrated and drink coconut water to prevent the RLS that continues to worry me.  She said to mention magnesium to the doctor.  I hope that issue will just go away and I won’t have to trouble Dr. Culp’s care team again.  

I have 3 1/2 days of drugs left so that too is close to the end.   The “year of the hip” is almost over!  

Progress!

I had my second outpatient PT session with Jennifer this morning.  I have had three nights now without RLS (restless leg syndrome) and am hoping this means that whatever was causing that problem has healed.  So I don’t have to contact Dr. Culp’s Care Team at POA for advice on what to do next.  I am making progress in the 30 days worth of drugs—over half way through them.  

Plus I have caught myself walking across the bathroom or kitchen without a cane and felt OK doing it.  Jennifer checked my gait and said I could walk without the cane as long as I felt safe—better to use the cane than to be a “furniture walker.”  I understand that term because I want to hang on to the counter or table when I walk without a cane.

We were not happy to learn that we owe $45 more each per month for our UHC Medicare Advantage plan.  And now we have learned that our $25-40 copay has gone up to $50 copay.  I mentioned this to Jennifer complaining that Trump has not cured inflation and she said not to go there and that he has done good things.  I disagree completely but find it hard to understand that she must be a Trumper!  

I will do another few weeks of PT although I feel I could do the exercises on my own and not have to go to that busy venue.  I don’t like being there as kind and affirming as Jennifer is.  I hope to cook a supper tonight for the first time really—except for the Valentine’s dinner of slow cooker lasagna that we did together.  Probably I’ll ask for Jim’s help again tonight.  We have had several meals from friends and family and leftovers from them as well as the slow cooker lasagna which made three meals. 

 I am so thankful that I got through the second surgery and am walking without pain.  I was a bit haunted by the hard parts of it last night when I thought about going back and giving some suggestions to the nursing team on the survey I was asked to complete.  Some nurses were very competent and kind, but in the middle of the night, two of them carried out a procedure without telling me how or why it was being done.  I asked questions and was not given much of an answer except to say that no, it would not cause an infection.  It was scary and I had a very hard time getting any sleep afterward.  

Best to forget the traumatic parts of the operations and hospital stays and focus on the improvement—and hope there will be no need for repeat operations.