The "word" for the year 2020 is "unprecedented" and that does summarize the year. A year ago I wrote in my spiritual journal that I objected to a 12Blog writer posting with optimism about the blank page of 2020. I was apprehensive about 2020 knowing that Jim would be facing treatment for prostate cancer and couldn't think of a blank page with eagerness. Little did I know that we would all be facing a pandemic that killed over 350,000 in the USA. That we would be wearing masks if we went into any stores or met with others--even our own family in their homes. And that we would still on January 5, 2021 be concerned about the presidential transition with President Trump continuing to refuse to concede and over this past weekend asking the Secretary of State in Georgia to "find" enough votes to overturn Georgia's handing Joe Biden a win. Maybe he will be indicted for that illegal phone call but probably not.
Tomorrow, January 6, is the day that Congress ratifies the electoral college's granting Joe Biden the Presidency--or refuses to recognize his winning the popular vote (over 7 million) and the electoral college vote (36 more than needed). It is frightening. I hope and pray there will not be violence in Washington, DC even as Trump is encouraging protests.
As I look back on 2020, a highlight was the marriage of Dan and Alex on December 12. Being able to witness that occasion with Jeff's family on their deck via Google Meets was a great joy. On January 2 we drove to 12 Aumick Road and visited Dan and Alex in their beautiful new home in a rural setting with a view of the hills. The house is wonderful with so many lovely features from elegant bathroom tiles to a large walk-in closet to a mud room with a laundry. And the wood floors are gorgeous--and so are the large windows that bring light in everywhere. They did very well! Now if they can just get good wifi in their remote location--this is a problem.
Another highlight was spending time with our grandchildren--with Laura's older three having sleepovers last summer with us (Alex had his sleepover in 2019) and with seeing little Henry grow from a pretty skinny newborn to a robust one year old who delights in playing peek-a-boo with his daddy as seen on a video this week. And having supper with James in Troy, his college town, and having a takeout picnic with Katie and her boyfriend Eli near her apartment here in Princeton. And having Michael be my IT consultant the first time I did a virtual choir performance. Those good memories make up for the loneliness of our social isolation and being unable to make new friends from our church or neighborhood. (two exceptions--walking and talking weekly with my new friend Peggy and reuniting with our friends from North Carolina days, the Moorheads, for outdoor coffees when it was still warm enough).
So more than almost ever before, I am aware of the great unknowns for 2021 and am trying to get rid of my fears--fears of illness and loss as we recognize our bodies are aging. Jim will have regular tests every three months to check on PSA levels and we have to hope and pray they will continue to be low. I have too much anxiety over that process and have to have courage to face whatever comes.
And when will we be able to have the Covid vaccine so that we can be freer to mingle with others? Maybe by summer? Will we be able to go to church again? to go to a concert? to a restaurant? So many ways that our lives have been limited in 2020. However, we registered tonight at covidvaccine.nj.gov to determine when it will be our turn for the vaccine. That is a good sign!
So I need to hang on to the good memories and try to enjoy this day and this moment with my husband of 53 years plus without fear for the future--his and mine.
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