A Tsumani of Loose Ends

 I don’t like loose ends.  I like closure.  This has been a few days with too many issues—not all that important—but too many loose ends.

I was convinced by an ACLU post in my email to give them $100 online.  Jim happened to be checking our credit card that day—the 20th of the month—and asked if I meant to give ACLU $100 four times.  No!  I called and talked to Vicki who was so appreciative of my being a long time supporter and so sorry for the error.  She said it would be fixed and they would call or email me. A few days later, there were no emails or calls but Jim said the credit card statement no longer had those four $100 gifts as “pending.”  They were gone.  I had thought if they didn’t go away, it was a worthwhile cause to stop our president.  The ACLU had argued successfully before the Supreme Court on the birthright issue.  But it is better that the mistake be corrected.  I will give to them again but I fear doing so.  Vicki told me to do it by phone but I don’t see how that would prevent errors if someone codes it in wrong.

Jim got his real ID in the mail several days ago but I did not.  He looked on our temporary IDs and it says that if you don’t get yours in 20 days, there is an email address to contact.  So I will be patient and hope this is not an issue and mine is lost somewhere in the postal system.  (Hooray!  July 27–my real ID came in today’s mail!)

Jim said we had two Amazon Prime Video charges this month and how did we have two accounts?  I do a yearly Amazon Prime charge in November to get our free shipping and that is probably worth it for the convenience of ordering.  But two video charges?  It is possible that one is for BritBox and one for Premium Amazon. He cancelled the premium charge with some difficulty and we will see if we can still get the TV sports that we want to watch.  And BritBox?  We used to enjoy some shows and should look them up again for a few laughs.  (In fact, we just watched with great amusement the first show of season 5 of Shakespeare and Hathaway—worth the monthly fee!)

Then there was my new hair styler with puzzling instructions on a sheet that was printed so faintly that it could hardly be read.  But my patient husband helped me figure it out and the styler that has been sitting in its box for a month or more can be used the next time I wash my hair.

We had two additional $45 charges on a email statement from the wedding hotel for getting early check-in even though the kind clerk said she had removed said charges because we had called that morning.  But those charges did not come through on the last credit card statement so that was settled too.

I guess the lesson here is to always be aware of the charges on one’s accounts and to be careful about what one is signing up to give or buy.  I appreciate my husband’s patience on all these issues.  Our lives are so involved in technology that it is easy to make mistakes on our part and that of others. 

A Passport and a Real ID

 We have no travel plans but I was motivated to get a passport out of fear that President Trump was going to make it difficult for me to vote next November by requiring a birth certificate and another document that gave my married name. And I definitely want to vote to get opposition in place to that man!

  I had my photo taken at the UPS store and with some trial and error, filled out the form to get a passport.  It was not possible to renew a passport at any of our local post offices. And the online form seemed problematic to me. Our daughter-in-law Susan who always has good advice suggested we take the forms to the Rocky Hill Post Office where parking is easy and the staff is not busy and had been helpful to her in the past.  We took her advice and it worked out so well.  The clerk knew exactly where the forms had to go and how to safely mail them.  So for $130 for a passport and $12.99 for mailing, off they went. And the renewed passport came back in the mail one day before our appointment for a real ID at our local BMV.

And that was another process I dreaded.  We went over the requirements more than once and put them in two folders, one for each of us.  I had a SS card with my present name so that was helpful. Jim’s SS card printed up a variation on his middle name which concerned him.  I had a birth certificate and marriage certificate and we found utility bills in each of our names with our present address.

The lines were long at the BMV but the staff was amazingly efficient and patient and we were in and out of there within 45 minutes.  The clerk did notice the discrepancy for Jim’s name and brought it to the attention of his superior, but it passed anyway.  My clerk did not even use my new passport but felt the other certificates would be easier for the typist to read.  So for $11 dollars each, we have temporary real IDs and will get the permanent ones in the mail in a few weeks.  We have no plans to fly anywhere, but if the need arises, we will be OK. 

These two procedures caused me some anxiety but both turned out well.  We had carefully prepared for both. And the people at UPS, the post office, and the BMV were competent and helpful.  And we won’t have to do it again for a long time, maybe never! 

Katie and Eli Got Married!

 My preparations were nothing compared to what others had to do but they caused me some stress.  My “cocktail dress” was going to be too tight because I gained far too much weight in the last year.  But I had another dress in the closet, never worn, and needing a hem.  So I hemmed and pressed that and knew it would be comfortable.  I realized that I needed a slip and the only ones I had were midi length or black.  But Amazon came through with a next day shipping—even if the order was delayed probably due to the flooding of our roads.Then there was a haircut on Friday and the difficulty in scheduling an early check-in from the hotel.  

The weekend started on Saturday at the Princeton University’s Prospect House with a brunch hosted by Jeff and Susan.  It was a lovely setting in the Alan Turing Garden Room—a long walk for me from the parking lot but I made it!  Jeff noted that I “worked the room” and I did mingle and chat with people I knew and didn’t know.  

We were not planning on going to the rehearsal dinner  Saturday evening but Susan seemed to think we were included and offered to pick us up.  It seemed a bit overwhelming to me but Jeff was disappointed that we were not going, so we said thanks and took advantage of their taking care of us again.  It was a nice dinner at the Ryland Inn, the wedding setting, and there were various toasts from parents and friends.

Sunday morning Jim called the Hyatt House and got us a 2 pm check which made it easier to get to the rehearsal at 3.  Katie wanted the grandparents there to practice the procession.  And yes, it was important because we were the pace setters and the first ones in.  I set a slow enough pace with my cane in hand.  The weather was great after the previous week’s heat and storms.  The wedding coordinator was no nonsense and gave everyone their orders. 

Jim had a role in reading I Corinthians 13 which he did well.  The other reader was cousin Erin who is a rabbi in training and she read Ruth’s promise to Naomi in Hebrew and English.  

Katie was beautiful and the vows were original to each other and very touching.  Eli was quite emotional in reading his vows.  We were amused when he said that his roommates upon meeting Katie warned him “don’t mess up!”

Photos took a long time during cocktail hour and then there was a sit down dinner in which we sat with the Conways and the Moorheads.  There was dancing and toasts during the evening.  Katie and Eli’s dance was a big hit as they put on quite the choreographed show with lifts. I did  join in the Hora where Katie and Eli were lifted high on chairs in the middle of our big dance circles.  

It is hard to converse in noisy rooms.  We were happy enough to be in our quiet hotel room around 9:30 pm.  As always, I didn’t sleep well but got in a few hours and was glad to have Jim in charge of driving home this morning—after one last good-bye breakfast at the hotel.

Seven Years

It’s an anniversary for us today!  On June 30, 2019 we left South Bend for Princeton, New Jersey.  We left the AirBnB where we had been living for a month.  Our house in Granger sold so quickly that we had to move out before we planned to do so.  We found a place right next to the Notre Dame campus that we think was a prime rental for football weekends.  There must have been ten football posters on the walls. We spent that month saying good-bye to friends and good-bye to our community for 28 years.

Then on July 1, we moved into our next transitional housing at Homewood Suites just a short ride from the Barclay Square Apartments in Princeton, New Jersey where our lease began on July 17.   We spent two weeks signing up for utilities, WiFi,  library cards, driver’s licenses, and buying the necessities that we had not moved—mattresses and many bookshelves.  

Our earthly goods all arrived on time and in good condition on an incredibly hot day.  The poor movers worked hard and the A/C could not keep up with the demand for several days.  Our family all showed up for a house warming party that weekend  with time in the apartment pool and was it pizza? And we do remember the ice cream cake that wouldn’t fit in the freezer so we had to cut it in half.

It took some time to find a church, and to find medical personnel that we liked and trusted.  And there were some hard times ahead with Jim’s prostate cancer diagnosis and then the Covid pandemic that affected all our lives—even if Jim and I never succumbed to the disease itself.  

But seven years later, we can still say we really like our lovely apartment and are finding it difficult to think of uprooting ourselves for continued care senior housing.  We are so happy to be nearer our children and some of our grandchildren.  One family is just ten minutes away; another about an hour, and the third sadly some further about 2 12 hours.  But all of that is so much better than 700 miles.

We miss South Bend friends and our church—and the opportunities on Notre Dame’s campus.  But we have not regretted our move and can celebrate seven years in our new home!

A Very Sociable Week

 I read advice for those of us who are very senior citizens emphasizing the importance of social contact to prevent dementia and maybe just to encourage longevity.  Seven years ago we left a community where we had many friends and acquaintances and a church where we literally knew everyone.  We made a move to be closer to children and grandchildren and have not been sorry.  But it takes time to feel a part of a new community and a new church.  This week I have been reminded of our progress in that regard!

Sunday while waiting for Jim to park the car and join me in the pew, two people came up to me to chat.  Later we were joined in our pew by a young family we had gotten to know.  We met all of these folks through joining small study groups over the last few years.  We did our part to feel a part of a large congregation and it was good.

Sunday afternoon our former neighbors came over for a happy hour.  We have gotten together with them several times since they moved away.  Best of all, we celebrated their wedding with them over a year ago.  

Tuesday evening we went to a lecture at our church as a part of a series commemorating the 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence.  We sat with friends and then walked to a restaurant in Palmer Square to have dinner together.  These folks have invited us to their home more than once and we have enjoyed restaurant meals with them also.  Again, we met them through small groups at church—twice when we were hosts.

Then this morning, old friends came over for coffee and muffins.   These were friends from Raleigh days with whom we have been able to renew friendships.  We raised children together years ago and now we have grown children and grandchildren to enjoy.  Again, they are part of our church community.

A new friend of mine had surgery this week.  I am past the stage of my life of cooking meals for folks, but we went to Trader Joe’s and bought several of our favorite items and left them at her doorstep along with a TJ’s bouquet of flowers.  She has referred to this kind of purchase as “assisted living” in our own style and so it is.  She said she felt spoiled eating our favorite coffee cake and my favorite chocolate mints.  

Jim has his usual partners for golf each week and plays with one gentleman whose scores are almost the same as his.  They keep score but it is a friendly competition and they are good partners.

So are we preventing dementia and encouraging longevity?  Maybe so, but at least we are happy to have new friends and sociability in our lives.

Lamorial: Everything They’ll Need

 I assume Lamorial is a play on Tutorial or Memorial.  I saw it online and paid my money and had it sent to me, knowing that sometimes these online purchases are a big mistake.  I don’t think this one is.  The idea is to get all your passwords, accounts, access—all in one place.  So that if I outlive Jim, I can get into our accounts.  I find it all overwhelming and maybe this will help.

I have set a goal of doing one page each day.  It is not fun and we both get a bit tense about it—with Jim trying to find his user IDs and passwords which are all foreign words—they are nonsensical for me.  I have a few user IDs myself and passwords—and had to retrieve what I had from the Indiana Retired Teachers Fund where I have a small pension.  I had to create a new password because I had not accessed it online before.

Fortunately, we can skip the mortgage page and debts.  There are several bank accounts and two credit cards of which I use only one—but it is good to have a backup one and Jim does use that one.  We have some monthly subscriptions but one or the other of us would probably continue those.  (Amazon Prime, NYT) and a couple of automatic charity withdrawals. 

We have a few more pages to go and then have to find a good place to put this important volume, a place that our executor Jeff can retrieve it when we are both gone.   I am thinking that maybe the next step will be to try to access each account to see if those user IDs and passwords are accurate.

It is a painful process but probably worth doing.  There are instructions as to what to do first.  There are places to put down phone numbers for our financial advisors (one local, one in South Bend).  

Laura’s 25th Reunion

Laura was celebrating her 25th reunion from Princeton this week.  She asked if she could spend the night Thursday and of course, we were happy to have her.  It all turned out to be more of an adventure than she anticipated.

I asked her to text us when she was leaving the campus and I was in my “mother” mode and worried about her walking alone on the dark streets.  She did text us when leaving and then when she got into her car but warned us that her key fob was almost out of power and although she got the car started by putting it right next to the ignition, that it could be a problem if she parked behind our garage thus blocking us in.

There didn’t seem to be any other parking places nearby so we chanced it.  Jim googled how to replace a battery because he remembered it being an issue with one of our fobs.  Fortunately, she was able to start the car in the morning and Jim drove her to CVS to get the correct battery.  It was replaced and she was able to get back to campus for a lunch and then a 4 pm session with a 95 year old John McPhee who was one of her writing professors 25 years ago.  How lovely for him to have a group out to his home.  I will be eager to hear more about that.  I remember reading someone saying that he had the gift of making each student feel like he or she was just the greatest student ever.  

Today was the P-rade and Michael sent a video of the whole family with their signs and Princeton gear ready to march in the rain.  Not a good day for reunion celebrations!

I’ll try to include a photo of Laura in her orange blazer.  Sometimes this works; sometimes it doesn’t!

Family and Friends

 

It has been a weekend for enjoying and being thankful for family and friends.  Saturday was grandson Michael’s graduation from George Washington University.  We joined the ceremony by livestream and were able to see Michael walk across the stage and hear his name read with his majors in music and psychology.  Sunday was granddaughter Ruth’s confirmation at Bryn Mawr Presbyterian Church.  We again joined by livestream and were able to hear Ruth say her vows with 15 other young people and to hear her name called.

Mark Noll, our friend from South Bend and Notre Dame, was the inaugural lecturer in a series on Presbyterians and the American revolution in our church, Nassau Presbyterian, on Sunday afternoon.  A graduate student brought him to our apartment and we enjoyed having lunch together and spending time visiting.  We got him to church plenty in time for his lecture at 4 pm and were able to greet Maggie, his wife, and my dear walking buddy from South Bend days.

On Monday Jim golfed with Eli, Katie’s fiancée and I met my good friend Peggy at the apartment playground for a chat.  It was very hot and not the best weather for golf but they enjoyed the round and I enjoyed the visit.

Monday morning we got a text from granddaughter Katie inviting us for a celebration dinner for her mom’s birthday and Michael’s graduation.   We were happy to say Yes.  I offered to bring my usual brownies but Katie had made a cake and decorated it for the occasion.  So we joined Katie, Eli, Jeff, Susan, and Michael for supper.  That means just a ten minute ride into Princeton, not a 700 mile trip like it used to be for family events.

We came home and watched a double overtime game in which the Spurs beat Oklahoma City Thunder and we read about the Mets win in the 12th inning with a score of 16-7.  A great sports night!

Mother’s Day

I have not blogged since April 25.  Sometimes it seems there is plenty to write about; other times not so much.  But today is the day after Mother’s Day so that gives me something to say.

First,  I am so thankful to be a mother and a grandmother.  That did not come without complications and delays but we are so blessed to have three children with three wonderful spouses and eight grandchildren.  I blogged about our wonderful family party for our 80th birthdays and I treasure the memory of that evening.  Our three children are spaced almost seven years apart and then five and a half years apart.  That is not the way we would have planned our family but it is the way we were given our family.  It has ramifications even now with the oldest three grandchildren all older than the youngest five.  

Jeff and Susan treated us to brunch at Triumph Brewery yesterday.  We walked there after church and sat on a bench in Palmer Square until the time of our reservation.  It was a beautiful spring day and there were families picnicking on blankets and children running happily around the grounds.  We had a lovely meal.  Jeff and Susan are always so good about making us feel welcome here in Princeton.  

Dan and Alex attempted a FaceTime call and somehow we missed it.  But we called them around 7 and made plans to visit in early June—when Alex is back from a Philadelphia yoga convention and their newly repaired roof should be finished.  Laura sent flowers and called.  Michael is with his mother in North Carolina along with his siblings.  I am happy for Grandma Di that she could get her entire offspring together.  Michael sent a photo of the beautiful scenery along with his wishes for a happy Mother’s Day.

So I heard from everyone—even granddaughter Katie who hoped we had a good lunch.  I felt loved and remembered.  

What You Should Have Read by Age 80

 I have been giving this idea some thought and then today’s NYT Book Review features exactly such an article.  I reject more books than I read each week.  I bring three or four books  home from the library and do well if I read two of them.  I download books for my Kindle app and delete many of them.  I have plenty of time to read but I don’t care to read anything that is not interesting and worth reading.  In the last few months, I have had much pleasure in rereading a series of books—the Maisie Dobbs mysteries by Jacqueline Winspear.  And I enjoyed them very much even if the plots were familiar.  I was happy for Maisie all over again when she found love for the third time and adopted a precious and needy little girl.  And I lived through the two world wars with her in dangerous and difficult times in England.

So what have I never read?  Sometime “By the Book” in the NYT  will ask that question of the interviewee.  What classic have you never read?  Well, I have never read To Kill a Mockingbird.  I have tried a few times and I think I will try again.  I have never read the great Russian novels by Dostoevsky and I may not get to those with their great length.  Although, I will not say never.  I have tried to read The Power and the Glory by Greene more than once and gave up.  To his credit, Jim picked it up recently and did read the whole thing and Lawless Roads also by Greene recounting his own time in Mexico.  Middlemarch?  I tried and have no interest in trying again.  Anything by Faulkner?  I have Sartoris on my Kindle app now and will give it a try. Love in the Time of Cholera?  I tried and gave up although I may try again. I have read War and Peace, memorably while nursing a baby 42 years ago during the middle of the night.  Short chapters made it easy to pick up and read a bit at a time.  I read Moby Dick because I wrote a paper on it for Freshman English many, many years ago.  I have read The Great Gatsby more than once but not Fitzgerald’s other novels.  

I read mysteries for escape but draw the line at serial killers, true crime books, and those that feature “family secrets” or abuse.  But then mysteries that are too “cozy” are not worth reading either, and certainly not those that feature a dog or a cat as the detecting partner.  

What have I read with interest in the last few weeks?  Abigail and John: the Portrait of a Marriage, a wonderful biography that lead me to looking for other biographies of that era—Benjamin Rush, Samuel Adams, Aaron Burr, Alexander Hamilton (a young adult book was just right for me!).   How to Get Filthy Rich in Rising East Asia by Hamid, such a strange, intriguing title and a strange, intriguing book but I enjoyed it and even took a screen shot of one memorable page.

Right now I am almost finished with a book Surprised by Hope by NT Wright that has been worth reading.  But I read only one dense chapter at a time and try to take notes on it.  And I have requested a brand new book from our library and picked it up today—The Secrets of the Abbey, a Brittany Mystery by Bannalec that I am sure  to enjoy.

Downsizing (Again!)

A few nights ago I lay awake in bed thinking about all the stuff we needed to get rid of again in anticipation of a possible move to senior housing which may come up soon or may be far off.  We have a deposit down so we are on the list.  The place will not or cannot commit to how long it will take.  In any case, I felt overwhelmed by what we have once again accumulated or kept in the almost seven years we have lived in this apartment.  I wrote a list and then went to sleep.

So yesterday I went to work looking over what we had to get rid of.  Jim suggested we call “1-800  Got Junk” so I did and made a plan for them to come today to give us an estimate and take things away.  Suddenly last night we got a call that they were in the neighborhood and could they come by in 45 minutes?  Sure.  So we hauled several items to the door downstairs.  They arrived around 8 pm and looked them over and said it would be $249 to take them away.  I said if we knew it would be that much we would not have asked them to come.  They said what would you want to pay?  I said $100.  They called their manager and he agreed to that amount!  Jim did give them a tip for their efforts.  So the garage is a little emptier with the broken lamp and two broken lawn chairs gone.  And one old golf bag.  The old vacuum cleaner is out of the closet.  The broken suitcase is out of its permanent spot in the guest bedroom.  Plus several old electronics are gone—saving us the trip we were planning on to take to Best Buy to recycle.  

Now, there are all the books.  And the dishes and pottery in the china hutch.  And music.  And my old work items that I can’t seem to throw out when I think of all the effort it took to put them together years ago.  But we have made progress and will be glad we have started to do so when our name does come up at Stonebridge.

July 22 I was able to give Dan and Alex a box of pottery—bowls and platters—many of them made by the pottery studio at Notre Dame. So they meant something to me and I am glad to pass them on to people who mean something to me!

The Day After a Great Birthday

 

My celebrations started with my friend Peggy bringing me Lindor truffles and a lovely card.  How thankful I am to have made a new friend and such a good friend here in Princeton—and even right at Barclay Square.

I received cards from two other friends from South Bend and Raleigh and texts from several others.  My sister called and so did my friend Sue.  Jim wrote me a very loving birthday greeting and we picked out white tulips and a few chocolates at Trader Joe’s on Saturday.  My four oldest grandchildren all texted with birthday greetings.  Laura sent beautiful flowers and called.  Michael and little Henry sent two videos.  Alex and Dan called with FaceTime.  And we went out to eat at Seasons 52 with Jeff and Susan and they shared ice cream cake with us at our apartment afterwards.  

Did I miss anything?  It was a full day of feeling affirmed and I am grateful for it.  I can’t help but wonder what the year will bring.  Last year was the “year of the hip” and I am glad that is over.  I hope and pray there are no medical crises this year.  I have a feeling it might be a year of a big move to Stonebridge and more and more, I am ready for that adventure.  As Jim pointed out in his card, we can do it together and that is good. 

Water!

Thursday afternoon we got an email from Eboni, our “leasing consultant” in the 1900 Building who takes

care of us all.  We were told that a water main broke and all of South Brunswick was under an advisory to boil water or use bottled water.  We fortunately had bottled water in the apartment because Jim had been using it for the humidifier he uses when the furnace is running.  

But it was hard to remember to not put one’s toothbrush under the tap water.  Or to use hand sanitizer after “washing” one’s hands in tap water.  I carefully washed our fruit and vegetables with bottled water. At least we were able to flush toilets and take showers although Jim was very careful not to get the contaminated water in his eyes. 

At one point I emailed Eboni and said she probably never thought her job description would be to advise about water, to scold about recyclables, or to tell folks not to crash private parties.  I said I was smiling at her emails and hoped she was still smiling.  She responded that my email made her smile. Sometimes it seems like she has to be the mother for 220 families telling us to break down our boxes for recycling or not to crash private parties in the clubhouse or to move a car parked in a restricted space.  

We were very glad when the warning was lifted and we could wash our hands with joy not needing to use the smelly hand sanitizer afterwards.  It was reminder of how we take good water for granted.  

Hospers, Iowa

 A few days ago, I wandered over to Stuff in the Basement, a blog done by James Schaap, that I check out

every once in a while.  I appreciated his Good Friday post in which he showed a series of photos of the crucifixion.  Along with one from a mission in California and one from Rome, there was a statue from Hospers, Iowa.  Hospers, Iowa?  I was surprised and intrigued.  I emailed Mr. Schaap and got such a pleasant response.  The statue was in the cemetery across from the Catholic Church in Hospers.

I could not help but reminisce about the summer we spent in Hospers in 1972.  A few memories that I shared with Mr. Schaap brought back even more memories so here is a story about the lives of a young couple and their four month old baby—a summer in a parsonage in a town of 400 people in the middle of rich farm country.

Jim had finished a Fulbright year and was going to start Harvard in the fall.  We needed a place to live for the summer and an income.  He contacted Calvin Seminary and they placed him in a Christian Reformed Church in Hospers with the duty of preaching twice a Sunday and some visiting. 

It was an adventure for a city girl. Jim remembers the mayor who was a church member telling him that his goal was to keep Sunday softball out of Hospers.  I remember Jim was asked to judge the 4th of July parade because he knew no one and could be unbiased!  

I can’t picture the inside of the parsonage but I know there was a wringer washing machine in the basement.  A woman of the church taught me how to use it and for the next several weeks, I carefully did our laundry there remembering my mother’s warning about the danger of wringers.  I hung the clothes on the line, including many diapers, always aware that I was being watched by church members.  

We were given a lot of good food.  There was meat butchered from the farms and lots of sweet corn. There was more than what we could eat at times.  An older, wiser pastor told us to never turn it down but just say thank you and give it away if you needed to.  Or it would stop coming!

We were told that folks in town never locked their doors when people saw that we did take that precaution.  That was advice we did not heed having come from a rougher neighborhood in the middle of the city of Grand Rapids.  We faced a real problem when our Toyota died and needed a part that was nowhere to be found locally.  I don’t know where it got mailed from but it was about ten days that we were really confined to town.  I don’t remember how we got groceries during that time.  And how did I find books to read?  No Kindle app!

We were invited to a picnic at one farm.  The food was all out on a table outside with flies sitting on the food.  Literally a pigpen was feet away.  I tried to ignore my fears and just enjoy the feast and the company.

At the end of the summer, the church had a farewell for us and took up a collection with the warning that they hoped we could keep the faith when going to Harvard.  We did keep the faith in a much different setting but were glad to have had the experience of Hospers and yesterday I was glad for the reminder of that experience.  

A Contrast

Our pastor wrote a meditation for Easter Sunday in which he contrasted the mention of the dark in the gospel of John with the resurrection.  “While it was still dark,” the women went to the tomb.  I am thinking today has been a day of the very sad contrast between celebrating Easter and our president’s “expletive-ridden” Truth Social post in which he threatened Iran with bombing bridges and power plants and then mockingly said “Praise be to Allah.”  This was such a dark message on such a holy day.  Our pastor reminded us that “light shines in the darkness and the darkness cannot overcome it.”  He wrote “On Easter morning God’s resurrection people rise to shout into the world’s darkness and say, “No, no, no.  There is a better way.  Because Christ has risen.  He has risen indeed.”

We worshipped with grand music this morning and a powerful message.  We participated in the Lord’s table.  We even sang the Hallelujah Chorus as we always do on Easter morning.  Then we came home to a quiet dinner with just the two of us.  Our family is all traveling far and wide.  

So it was a good day.  But I grieve for our country and I am ashamed of our leadership and the ugly words that are our president’s way of commemorating Easter Sunday.  I pray for his change of heart every night. 

—————-Tuesday:  At 6:30 pm, there may be a two week cease fire.  Trump has threatened to end the Iranian civilization by 8 pm which is certainly a war crime and sounds like a threat of using nuclear power.  Iran may open the straights of Hermuz.  Pakistan may be the intermediary.  Whatever it is, there is a respite from destruction for now. There may be more calls for Trump to be removed from office which would be such a good thing.  

April 17 from Frank Bruni: his foul tirades demean the presidency, demean the country — demean every one of us — and it’s important that we never forget that. 

Good Friday 2026

 I have tried for several years to read an entire gospel or sometimes an epistle on Good Friday. One year I forgot and then did it on Easter Monday.  Another year I listened to one of Bach’s Passions.  Last year was a memorable year for this discipline but I couldn’t remember which gospel I read.  I think it was Matthew and I read it on my iPhone while going through the very stressful process of the nuclear stress test for my heart as a part of the preparation for hip surgery.  There was nothing wrong with my heart but the process was frightening as my heart was stimulated through a drug.  I guess because I was reading on my phone I did not record which gospel I read in our Bible.  However, I see that I had not read Luke since 2016 so that seemed a good book to read today—thankfully and mercifully just sitting in my “headquarters” as Jim calls it.

I have read the first ten chapters and am taking a break to shower and maybe do the livestream church service at noon.  I am reading on my iPad and using The Message, Eugene Peterson’s translation.  It is startling in its language of today.  As I often do, I thought can these words really be in Scripture?  I refer to the NRSV and sure enough, there they are in more traditional language.  So it is a good exercise to be reading a fresh translation and one that does not let me just slide over the words out of habit.

—————It’s now 1:45 and I have read the entire gospel and feel as if I have commemorated Good Friday and am leading up to Easter.  The church service at noon was all readings and music and was very solemn and ended up with the story of the tomb.  Now we wait for the celebration of Easter.  I hope we can worship in the sanctuary with trumpets and triumphal hymns and even the traditional Hallelujah Chorus.  

I was especially moved by the anthem “I Heard the Voice of Jesus Say:”

1. I heard the voice of Jesus say,
“Come unto Me and rest;
Lay down, O weary one, lay down
Thy head upon My breast.”
I came to Jesus as I was,
Weary, and worn, and sad;
I found in him a resting-place,
And he has made me glad.

It has been a year of feeling “weary and worn” more than once and I have come to Jesus “as I was.”  Now the year is over.  We don’t know what the next year may bring but I try to trust that God will go with us and we will have “a resting-place” again.

A Birthday Party

 

Last night there were 14 of us at dinner in a private dining room at Romeo’s Restaurant in Plainsboro gathered to celebrate our 80th birthdays—Jim’s was in February and mine is coming up in April.  We met with the owner on Wednesday to plan the menu. Romeo’s had the table set very nicely with black cloth napkins.  Jeff and Susan brought various items to celebrate—like a tiara and sash for me and a cap for Jim.  Laura had ordered huge balloons.  Our friends the Moorheads were able to join us but sadly the four oldest grandchildren were away at school or work.  

We chose a caprese salad and mozzarella sticks for a first course.  Jim and I brought wine from a morning trip to Trader Joe’s.  There were three entrees, spaghetti and meatballs, vodka rigatoni, and chicken parmigiana.  Each person ordered a dessert of choice from the menu.

I had made up a quiz for how well do you know your parents and grandparents and it went well with a lot of discussion and questioning and laughter.  

We felt very grateful for being able to celebrate with family.

 

12 Hours Without Power

 Last night there was a terrific wind and suddenly there was no power.  We were just getting into bed close to midnight.  We found the flashlight and knew that when the power came back on, we would be surprised with bright lights and loud signals.  But the power did not come back on.  I checked my phone around 1 am which was the only way to know the time and it gave an estimated time of 4:30 am for restored  power.  Then that got pushed back to 2:00 pm. 

 Jim had his annual physical at 9 am but the garage door opener was not functioning of course.  He was able to open the door manually which we had not done in the six years we lived here.  I tried to message him to pick up coffee at Burger King but with the internet down, that message did not go out.  However, he thought of that great idea himself and we got our drug of choice even if we enjoyed it a bit later than usual.  

With Jim gone and my cell phone out of power, I was more careful than usual not to fall.  I would have had no way of getting help until he got home.  It was so dark and disconcerting to walk into rooms and try to turn on a light foolishly!  We had guests coming at 4 pm and I was hoping to bake some almond bars but that had to wait.

11:44:  Suddenly the dining room lights brightened the apartment.  Power!  Hooray!  But we still had trouble with WiFi.  I suggested Jim turn the router off and on and that seemed to do the trick.  However, Xfinity messaged us later to say they restored WiFi at 4:50 pm.  

It was not cold at least  and we didn’t need to cook.  Jim took a quick shower before leaving home—while there was still some hot water in the tank.  I washed up with cold water later.  

How dependent we are on power!  I read my book for a while carefully finding a place where light was coming in a window.  During the night I opened the blinds just to have enough light from the sky to find my way to the bathroom.  

Our guests were at the Hampton Inn and were not aware of losing power.  Jeff said he was also not aware of losing power.  Maybe it was a very localized Barclay Square issue.  But we are glad it is over and we are in touch with the world again!

Celebrating the end of “The Year of the Hip”

The year began on March 3, 2025 when an x-ray came back as severe osteoarthritis and officially ended on March 3, 2026 but I was having too many problems with back muscle spasms to want to celebrate.  However, that has been much better the last few days so tonight we went to our usual place for celebrations—On the Border.  We were early enough to do the happy hour and today was a special for fajitas for two.  I thought I ordered a small margarita but there it was—the grande.  And it was good and a real treat after a month of no alcohol with my pharmacy of post surgery drugs.

I am able to walk without a cane or walker in the apartment.  I haven’t wanted to walk outside yet without some assistance but that time will come.  I am doing some exercises daily that Jennifer and Justin, my physical therapists,, taught me.  I am trying to walk at least a short ways daily.  Sadly, some bills are starting to arrive and there will probably be more asking for what insurance did not cover.  But the “year of the hip” is over and I am so grateful to be walking without pain and with more mobility.

A Bridal Shower

Katie’s maid of honor and bridesmaid gave her a lovely shower this afternoon. It was held at Chamber’s Cafe in Lawrenceville, about a twenty minute ride from Princeton.  Susan and Katie gave me a ride there and Alex gave me a ride home.  The room was decorated festively and there was a bingo card designed to help us mingle and get to know each other.  The buffet brunch was delicious.  I was thankful for Julie Weed’s help (Eli’s mom) because using a cane and filling a plate can be a challenge.  

The gift opening was going to be saved for later at Jeff and Susan’s house.  I was happy with my purchase of a mirrored vanity tray—very much like the one someone gave me at a bridal shower almost 60 years ago.  I hope Katie can use it and remember her grandma for many years to come! 

I was unsure if I would be able to make it to the shower with the back muscle spasms that have been bothering me this week.  But I did it and managed to forget them for most of the time.